m Tl; 1951 PHce 15 Cents Qi n, *J° %rb, ^ / viSSt? « "¦. - g ;* w « <^> •tjftw €11 <^ <^ <^<3> ClAYTOW ~V**v/$Or K A TO U R A, Owner— Robert E. Tod, Designed and built by Herreshoff Mfg. Co. Length P3' — beam 16 '. Twin Sterling Viking II 6 cylinder engines, total WO H . P. 1200 R. P. M. Speed at 1050 R. P. M.—13.9 knots. m - i !¦<¦¦ r Rfe The Sterling Viking II engines in the Katoura occupy moderate space, impart excellent speed and are operated from the bridge deck — eight- hundred and fifty horsepower easily controlled. STERLING INTRODUCED AND PERFECTED IN MARINE SERVICE (1) Dual valves in the head, affording 50% more valve area. (2) Removable cylinder liners, providing uniform cylinder thickness. (3) Counterweighted and dynamically balanced crankshaft, reducing bearing loads 50%. These and other features, have attendant advantages, fully catalogued, and the book is available to those interested in high duty engines. The Viking II 8 cylinder engine, rated at 565 H.P. actually develops, on the test block at Buffalo, over 600 H.P. at 1200 R.P.M.— fully 20% more power than any comparative engine. A 250 hour test recently concluded with a 48 hour continuous run on 500 H.P. load, finishing with a final full power development. The engine was then dismantled, under government supervision, and found in per fect condition. This test is equivalent to one season's running. Sterling Vikings have been in Marine Service three years and have been substantially proven for you. STERLING ENGINE CO. BUFFALO, N.Y., U.S.A. TWECWICAGOAN 1 ¦x Mr.ond Mrs. Richard Harried Pomeroij request th« honour 01 qoiit* ppcsetw* of tm: mamAaae of ttwir aouqnW l:li,ol„tl, to Mr. Charles HowoiJ Mauri) Tnutsduo,,tnti twentij- seventh of June ot noli after eiqht o'clock in the ev«nimj The Dlocksfone C hico<jo Mr. and Mm. Chorles Howopd Mounj . tftc first of Au<)<..t «li Lolee SIkm* Dm HAND-ENGRAVED WEDDING CARDS, CREATED BY SKILLED CRAFTSMEN, CORRECT IN THEIR FORMAL CONTENT, REFRESHING IN THEIR VARIATIONS, AWAIT YOUR SELECTION IN THE STATIONERY ENGRAVING SECTION MARSHALL FIELD & COMPANY TWECUICAGOAN THEATKE <iMuskal +THREE LITTLE GIRLS— Great North ern, 26 W. Jackson. Central 8240. Natalie Hall and Charles Hedley in that lovely old Viennese operetta that's been here for such a long time. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.85; Saturday, $4.40. Wednesday mat., $2.50; Satur day, $3.00. ¦KfiARL CARROLL'S SKETCH BOOK— Garrick, 64 W. Randolph. Central 8240. Will Mahoney, still doing his xylophone dance and being generally funny, William Demarest and The Three Sailors. Cur- tain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.85. Saturday mat., $2.50. MMARTLAHD, MY MARYLAND — Grand Opera House, 119 N. Clark. Cen tral 8240. Revival of the popular op eretta of not so long ago that you can't remember how pleasant it was. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $2.50. Mat inees, $1.50. To be reviewed later. T>rama +THE NINTH GUEST— Adelphi, 11 N. Clark. Randolph 4466. Mystery melo drama with a lot of killings at a penthouse party. Curtain, 8:40 and 2:40. Eve nings, $3.00. Matinees, $2.00. *l/P POPS THE DEVIL— Selwyn, 180 N. Dearborn. Central 3404. Roger Pryor and Sally Bates in a conventional comedy of gin and young married life in Green wich Village and some very funny lines. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.00. Thursday and Saturday mat., $2.00. +WHEN FATHER SMILES— Cort, 132 N. Dearborn. Central 0019. De Wolf Hopper, in a comedy, as a middle-aged grouch with a mania for toy elephants. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $1.50; Saturday, $2.00. Matinees, $1.00. Re viewed in this issue. *A LADY IH PAWN— Apollo, 74 W. Randolph. Central 8240. Guy Bates Post as a latter-day Shylock who demands his full weight of human poundage which happens to be a beautiful lady. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.00. Mati nees, $2.00. Reviewed in this issue. ?PETTICOAT INFLUENCE— Harris, 170 N. Dearborn. Central 8240. Helen Hayes as a Mayfair one who attempts to help her husband by mixing in British politics. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Eve nings, $3.00. Wednesday mat., $2.00; Saturday, $2.50. Reviewed in this issue. ?STEPPING SISTERS— Blackstone, 60 E. 7th St. Harrison 6609. Blanche Ring, Grace Huff and Helen Raymond as three former burlesque queens who hold a re union after a twenty year separation. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.00. Matinee, $2.00. Reviewed in this issue. "THE CHICAGO AN" PRESENTS— Town Spring, by Clayton Rawson Cover design Current Entertainment Page 2 Hospitable Hostelries 4 Editorial 7 Chicago Before and After, by The Three Doctors 9 Hockey and a Tea Fight, by Char lotte Reynolds 10 Why Palm Beach? by Courtney Bor den n Sketch, by Clarence Biers 12 "Fellow Citizens, Etc.--" by James Weber Linn 13 Town Talk, by Richard Atwater 15 Spirits, by Edgar Britton 16 Fistix Aside, by N<*t Karson 17 Photograph, by Paul L. Rittenhouse.... 19 Chicagoana, by Donald Plant and Philip Tiesbitt 20-21 When "Shoopee" Was a War Cry, by Wallace Rice 22 The Stage, by William C. Boyden 24 The CineMa, by William R. Weaver.... 27 Books, by Susan Wilbur 31 Music, by Robert PoIIai^ 34 Go Chicago, by fames Albert Wales.... 36 Couplet, by Stooge 37 Shops About Town, by The Chicago- enne 38 THE CHICAGOAN'S Theatre Ticket Service Stars opposite theatres listed above indicate plays to which tickets may be purchased in ad' vance at box office prices by readers of The Chicagoan. A convenient form for use in filing application is provided on page 40. MTHE SACRED FLAME— Goodman Me morial, Lake Front at Monroe. Central 4030. W. Somerset Maugham's play about a mother who sacrifices her love, her rigorous morals for her invalid son and for his love-starved wife. Curtain. 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings and Friday mat,. $2.00. To be reviewed later. ?THAT'S GRATITUDE— Blackstone, 60 E. 7th St. Harrison 6609. Alan Dine- hart in Frank Craven's agreeable comedy about a house guest who stays too long. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.00. Matinees, $2.00. To be reviewed later. ?APRON STRINGS— Playhouse 416 S. Michigan. Harrison 2300. Comedy about the hardships of a young wife whose husband's life is managed by post humous letters of his doting mother. Cur tain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.00. Matinees, $2.00. To be reviewed later. ELIZABETH THE ^,1/EEN— Illinois, 65 E. Jackson. Harrison 6510. Alfred Lunt and Lynn Fontanne in the Guild's pro duction and Maxwell Anderson's version of that little affair between Elizabeth and Essex. Curtain. 8:30 and 2:30. Eve nings, $3.00. Wednesday mat., $2.00; Saturday, $2.50. To be reviewed later. ?PAGAN LADT— Erlanger, 127 N. Clark. State 2460. Lenore Ulric as a rum-run ner's sweetheart and the old sex-and- religion theme with a Florida resort hotel as the setting. Curtain, 8:30 and 2:30. Evenings, $3.00: Saturday, $3.85. Mati nees, $2.00. To be reviewed later. THE LAND OF OZ — Selwyn, 180 N. Dearborn. Central 3404. A revival of the most successful of the Junior League's plays for children and the last of the season. You'd really better drop in with the family. Saturday mornings at 10:30. Ticket prices, $1.50, $1.00, $0.50. REBECCA OF SUWTBROOK FARM— Goodman Memorial, Lake Front at Mon roe. Central 4030. Fourth of the Good man matinees for children. The popular novel of other days by Kate Douglas Wig- Kin, adapted for the stage. Saturdays at 2:30. Ticket prices, $1.00, $0.75, $0.25. rT'S A GAT LIFE— Eighth Street theatre, 741 S. Wabash. Harrison 6834. The an nual musical revue of the Haresfoot Club of the University of Wisconsin will be presented on the evening of April 17. MUSIC CHICAGO STMPHONT ORCHESTRA — Orchestra Hall, 216 S. Michigan. Harrison 0363. Regular subscription program. Friday afternoons, Saturday evenings. The fortieth season. Frederick Stock, conductor. Telephone for pro gram information. [continued on page four] The Chicagoan — Martin J. Quigley, Publisher and Editor: W. R. Weaver, Managing Editor; published fortnightly by the Chicagoan Publish ing Co , 407 South Dearborn St., Chicago, 111. New York Office: 1790 Broadway. Los Angeles Office: Hotel Roosevelt. Pacific Coast Office: Simpson-Reilly Union Oil Building, Los Angeles; Russ Building, San Francisco. Subscription $3.00 annually; single copy 15c. Vol XI, No 2— April 11 1931 * Copyright 1931. Entered as second class matter March 25, 1927, at the Post Office at Chicago, III., under the act of March 3, 1879. TI4ECUICAG0AN 3 ION DON GENEVA Miss Traveler, c/o American Express Co. 6 Haymarket, London, England. And now Venice! For three weeks she had heen traveling in Europe . . . Paris, Lucerne, Geneva. She herself had hardly known where she would he next . . . and the folks at home! How were they to know? And, too, how she longed for a word from them. At parting she had told them: Write care of the American Express, London." Little did she know what that was to mean to her later. She had thought only of London or Paris. She did not know how widespread was the American Express service in Europe. But she soon learned. She asked for her mail in Venice. Her letter was there! . . . It had fol lowed her from London to Paris, from Paris to Geneva, and on to Venice. All along the route this lone woman traveler had been assisted by the American Express organization. At Southampton a solicitous courier in American Express uniform had helped her to her boat train. At London she had arranged for her tour of England. At 11, Rue Scribe, Paris (the Company's office), she had secured her travel accommoda tions for Switzerland and Italy. On entering Italy an American Express interpreter had helped her with the troublesome details of the customs. But it ivas this Jotter in Venice that brought home to her the completeness of American Express service. Naturally, it was an American Ex press man who at the conclusion of her European travels, saw her safely on her steamer bound for home. Her trip had been "thrilling," but. it was made so by the experienced help of the travel men in the Ameri can Express offices wherever she went. She had made sure that she would be entitled to this helpfulness before she left home, by changing her travel money into the convenient American Express Travelers Cheques. American Express Company WORLD SER VI C E FO R T R A VELERS American Express Company 65 Broadway, New York 599 Market St., at Second, San Francisco Please send me information on a trip to— leaving about —lasting- Name Address; 70 East Randolph St., Chicago, III. 603,608 Standard Bldg., Atlanta, Ga. .weeks. 4 THE CHICAGOAN [listings begin on page two] WOMAN'S SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA OF CHICAGO— Goodman Memorial, Lake Front at Monroe. Central 4030. Regular subscription program. The re' maining concert is on Monday evening, April 20, at 8:15. The fifth season. Ebba Sundstrom, conductor. Telephone for program information. BENEFIT BOXIKG— The Chicago Riding Club, East Ontario at McClurg Court. Illinois-Michi- gan-Wisconsin National Guard Cham' pionship. Sponsored by The Black Horse Troop Association for the benefit of the Illinois National Guard, April 11 at 8:15 P. M. TABLES Luncheon — Dinner — Later MAILLARD'S— 308 S. Michigan. Harri son 1060. Notable cuisine, alert service and surroundings that match. ST. HUBERT'S OLD EHGLISH GRILL —316 Federal. Webster 0770. God save our gracious St. Hubert's. PICCADILLY— 410 S. Michigan. Harri son 1975. Happy offerings of fine cook ing and the often-mentioned view of the lake. GRAYLING'S— 410 N. Michigan. White hall 7600. Well served dishes that tempt in the hour of need of food. •TIP TOP INN— 206 S. Michigan. Wabash 1088. Critical tastes of the patrons give unneeded stimulus to the chef. MAISONETTE RUSSE— 2800 Sheridan Road. Lakeview 10554. Savory Rus sian-European dishes and exclusive at mosphere. HENRICI'S— 71 W. Randolph. Dearborn 1800. Culinary offerings of the best with coffee and lack of music the fea tures. JIM IRELAND'S OYSTER HOUSE— 632 N. Clark. Delaware 2020. As noble a selection of marine dishes as you'll find anywhere. HARDING'S COLONIAL ROOM— 21 S. Wabash. State 0841. For luncheon, tea or dinner — just wonderful food. RED STAR INN— 1528 N. Clark. Dela ware 3942. For these thirty years the center of German cooking and good cheer. LAIGLON— 22 E. Ontario. Delaware 1909. Splendid New Orleans-Parisian foods prepared by an inspired chef. JULIEH'S— 1009 N. Rush. Delaware 4341. Mamma Julien's smile is broad and bounteous and so is the table. Better 'phone. NINE HUNDRED— 900 N. Michigan. Delaware 1761. Servicing that makes you feel at home in the world of cake and conversation. CIRO'S— 18 W. Walton. Delaware 2592. Where the epicure can find the catering to which he is accustomed, whether it be at luncheon, tea or dinner. RICKETTS— 2727 N. Clark. Diversey 8922. Here you may stifle the life of the party with big steaks in the small hours. HUYLER'S— 20 S. Michigan, 310 N. Michigan, Palmolive Building. Throngs pass these hospitable portals and many enter. LE PETIT GOURMET— 615 N. Michi gan. Superior 1184. Exclusive for iuncheon, tea or dinner. Alert service and fine cuisine. VASSAR HOUSE— Diana Court, 540 N. Michigan. Superior 6508. Luncheon, tea, dinner and even breakfast in Hola- bird and Root's most modern manner. EITEL'S — Northwestern Station. A scarcity of good restaurants in the neighborhood, but Eitel's is there. CASA DE ALEX— 58 E. Delaware. Superior 9697. Castilian catering and the romantic atmosphere of Old Spain, too. ROCOCO HOUSE— 161 E. Ohio. Dela ware 1242. Swedish service and food stuffs — you'll leave well-fed and content. KAU'S— 127 S. Wells. Dearborn 4028. German menu especially satisfactory to the hearty eater. zjXComing — Noon — Nigh t PALMER HOUSE — State at Monroe. Randolph 7500. The Palmer House orchestra plays in the Empire Room: dinner, $2.50 and Mutschler in attend ance. In the Victorian Room, dinner, $2.00; Gartmann in charge. Chicago Room, dinner, $1.50 and Horrmann is there. STEVEHS HOTEL— 730 S. Michigan. Wabash 4400. A large, lively establish ment with Harry Kelley and his orchestra and three acts in the main dining room: dinner, $2.00; no cover charge. A trio plays in the Colchester Grill; dinner, $1.50. HOTEL SHERMAN— Clark at Randolph. Franklin 2100. Ben Bernie and his or chestra at College Inn. Thursday is The atrical Night. Maurie Sherman and his band play for tea dances and Gene Fos- dick is at the Bal Tabarin Saturday evenings. CONGRESS HOTEL— Michigan at Con gress. Harrison 3800. Jan Garber and his orchestra play in the Pompeiian Room during the dinner hour and later in the Balloon Room, where the service is a la carte and no cover charge. Tele phone Ray Barrett for reservations. HOTEL LA SALLE— La Salle at Madison. Franklin 0700. Husk O'Hare and his boys, perennial favorites here, play in the Blue Fountain Room for a crowd of nice, young people. Dinner, $1.50. Supper, $1.00. No cover charge. SENECA HOTEL— 200 E. Chestnut. Superior 2380. The service and the a la carte menu in the Cafe are hard to match, no matter how meticulous the diner may be. Table d'hote dinner, $1.50. BISMARCK HOTEL— 171 W. Randolph. Central 0123. Where service is a duty and the German dishes are a pleasant memory. Grubel is head waiter. LAKE SHORE DRIVE HOTEL— 181 Lake Shore Drive. Superior 8500. One of those knowing places where service and cuisine are impeccable. Dinner, $2.50: no dancing. Langsdorff is maitre. BREVOORT HOTEL— 120 W. Madison. Franklin 2363. Here the fine old tradi tions of American culinary art are pre served. Sandrock is head waiter. EDGEWATER BEACH HOTEL— 5349 Sheridan Road. Longbeach 6000. Phil Snitalny and his outfit play in the Marine Dining Room. Weekly cover charge. $1.00; Saturday, formal, $2.00. Dinners, $2.00 and $2.50. DRAKE HOTEL— Lake Shore Drive at Michigan. Superior 2200. Verne Buck and his orchestra and the superior Drake menu and atmosphere. A la carte serv ice with Peter Ferris in charge. Weekly cover charge, $1.25; Saturday, $2.50. Table d'hote dinner in the Italian Room, $2.00. BLACKSTONE HOTEL— 656 S. Michi gan. Harrison 4300. The polite and formal Blackstone service and catering arc traditional. Margraff directs the String Quintette and Otto Staack greets. SHORELAND HOTEL— 5454 South Shore Drive. Plaza 1000. The usual fine Shoreland cuisine and hospitality make it one of the more popular south- side rendezvous. Dinner, $2.00. KHICKERBOCKER HOTEL — 161 E. Walton. Superior 4264. The magnifi cent new ballroom is perfectly suited to private parties. In the main dining room, dinner, $1.50; in the Coffee Shop, $1.00. CHICAGO BEACH HOTEL— 1660 Hyde Park Blvd. Hyde Park 4000. A pleas ant place with an ample menu and alert service. Convenient for the southside diners-out, especially. Dinners, $1.50 and $2.00. Gifford is in charge. BELMOHT HOTEL— -31 56 Sheridan Road. Bittersweet 2100. Catering that is above reproach and equally notable service, especially for the northside diners. No dancing and dinner, $2.00. 'Dusk Till Dawn FROLICS— 18 E. 22nd St. Victory 7011. Charles Kaley and his band play the tunes and there's a floor show with several wellknown entertainers. Weekly cover charge, $1.00; Saturday, $1.50. MACKS CLUB— 12 E. Pearson. White hall 6667. Harry Glyn and Trudy Da vidson are featured in the revue and Jules Novit and his orchestra turn out the music. Cover charge, $1.00. CASA GRANADA— 6800 Cottage Grove. Dorchester 0074. Paul Whiteman and his big orchestra make grand music and the floor show is far and away above the ordinary. There is no cover charge. Billy Leather is head waiter. PETRUSHKA CLUB— 165 N. Michigan. Dearborn 4388. Much Russian atmos phere and entertainment and an Amer ican revue, Sol Wagner and his orches tra and all very unique. Dinner, $2.00: no cover charge. COLOSIMO'S— 2126 S. Wabash. Cal umet 1127. Jimmy Meo and his or chestra play and there is a floor show of a different sort. A la carte service. No cover charge at any time and dinner, $1.50. CLUB ALABAM— 747 Rush. Delaware 3260. Chinese and Southern menu and Willie Newberger and his band and a clever revue. Cover charge, $1.00. BLACKHAWK— 139 N. Wabash. Dear born 6262. Coon-Sanders and their band, old favorites of the Town, and additional entertainment. Dinner, $1.50. No cover charge. TERRACE GARDENS— Morrison Hotel. 79 W. Madison. Franklin 8600. Clyde McCoy and his outfit play and there's the famous Morrison kitchen to prepare vour food. Dinners, $1.50 and $2.00. No cover charge. CLUB AMBASSADEUR— 226 E. Ontario. Delaware 0930. Jimmie Noone and his orchestra are there to play for you and for the floor show. And there is a pop ular after-theatre menu. No cover charge. GRAND TERRACE— 39 55 South Park way. Douglas 3600. Earl Hines and his orchestra, and Earl at the piano. A fast, colored floor show. Weekly cover charge, 50 cents; Saturday, $1.00. TME CHICAGOAN THE CHICAGOAN Social §oleci§m$ Admitting that our Mildred is a figure from Finkles — Gowned by Saks — Photoei by Kaufmann & Fabry. (2) Mildred Muffs the Big Chance It's that sort of play no thinking child would take her elders to. And here's Mildred, poor dear, in the fifth row center with Aunt Sophia Butterworth (of the Boston Watch and Ward Butterworths). You know Mildred. She's one of those winsome washouts who thought "Rain" was the sequel to "Lightnin'." ^flf the Butterworth millions devise to worthier charities, it's nobody's fault but Mildred's. No one who makes Lloyd Lewis and his Daily News reviews a reading habit picks 'em wrong on Chicago's Rialto these days. Mr. Lewis is one of Chicago's most forthright first-nighters. His reviews pack a puissant punch and there's nothing sotto voce about his daily column "Stage Whispers." Courageous, frank, entertaining, his notes on the stage and its personalities guide aright the steps of thousands of Chicago's discriminating theater-goers. 1& And when Mildred gets the Lewis habit (as get she must) she'll learn about Books from jt>s smart to read O'Brien, Society from Donahue, and the lively side of TT TT F DATTY NF ^A^ S life from Provines, Casey, Morgan and a host of others. Chicago's home newspaper Discovery \A/E had always wondered what a radio commissioner " V does when he isn't busy assigning wavelengths to broadcasting stations or tracking down juvenile Marconis or fretting about static. Then we read Commissioner Harold A. Lafount's declaration that what television needs most is censorship and now we know. The commissioner confides that he believes television is to become the greatest force in the world and then counsels deliberation in its development, adding, "I believe the pic tures must be censored." This makes it pretty plain that what a radio commissioner does when he isn't assigning wavelengths is pretty much what all the other natural born censors do, and that makes it pretty plain that Amos V Andy are not the deadliest milestone around radio's neck after all. (Tune in a vocal chorus of My Canary's Got Circles Under His Eyes and a couple of radio melodramas or a True Story hour to complete a picture of the radio commissioners in full stride.) Art Criticism I HE Spring urge to do-something-about-it has gripped 1 the Art Institute. One Minute S\etches, the monthly publication distributed to alumni of that institution, advo cates in its current issue a financial endowment of the journalistic art critic to the end that he may have no other jobs before him, plus an automobile in which to track down the unsung genius in his attic studio, plus leisure to explore and expose to a stinted world whatever masterpieces he may come upon among the rafters. Not, as Spring suggestions go, a bad idea. It must be pointed out, however, that most of the prem ises are false. There has never been difficulty in getting art critics into attic studios; the trouble lies in getting them out. Nor have we noted a genuine case wherein a critic has lacked leisure to turn up an ample supply of discov eries; more often his lack is of proof that they are. If, as One Minute S\etches implies, endowment obtainable at the moment aggregates an amount in excess of artists' needs, it may better be devoted to the endowment of agents versed in the art of obtaining endowments. In that way, with in credibly good fortune, enough funds might be amassed to endow a radio-movie-tabloid-Covici Friede civilization with an interest in Art, which would solve all of the problems and no doubt bring all of the artists into radio-movie- tabloid-Covici Friede prosperity overnight. Fi ux \VV/E wouldn't mind the depression so much, or even ? ? the talk about it, if it weren't doing what it is to dignities. Entirely apart from a reasonable concern as to what becomes of a nation when all of its idols have tum bled, the spectacle is unpleasant. We're beginning to doubt that it even sells newspapers. To illustrate, we feel a good deal less keenly a ten-point drop in U. S. Steel than in Mr. Frank J. Loesch's confession that he obtained a relatively honest election by throwing himself upon the mercy of Al Capone. U. S. Steel can come back. Nor does a recession in General Motors stick in memory one-tenth so painfully as the picture of Sinclair Lewis and Theodore Dreiser at fisticuffs over their cups. Dempsey's rheumatic gesture at Wills, Lardner's ghastly imitation of Rogers, Tammany's descent to the obvious . . . what are Board of Trade calamities compared to these? Yet these might be borne. After all, none of the heroes named were indispensable. It is the clinching evidence afforded by the nobility of gentler sex, by their pell mell dash into the coffee, soap and mattress testimonials, that really stuns us. This is far too much, even in the name of charity, of hard times, or of good business. Patriotism might justify it, but we lack a war. Without one, it can only deprive a lot of movie actresses and baseball players of their endorsement money, but not even this is our cause for alarm. What we're really afraid of is that the country's drifting headlong into democracy and that we'll bound out of our shower some fine morning to find everybody, our selves included, created free and equal. If we do, don't tell us we didn't warn you. "See Chicago Sin" OUR page would not be complete without an item on the Reverend Philip Yarrow's conviction on a charge of prosecution — or was it persecution? — with malice. No, not a chortling item. We couldn't do that, and the columnists have done it anyway. Ours the helping hand, as is ours the Golden Rule, wherefore we've thought out a plan whereby Mr. Yarrow can not only recoup his estate to the extent of the $5,000 fine imposed but, with no additional effort, establish a paying business free of official or unofficial impediment. Yes, and now that we think of it, this very plan is capable of accomplishing whatever good Mr. Yar row's previous efforts may have sought to accomplish in the event of their being earnest. The Town has long lacked a sight-seeing service of the more exciting and profitable kind operated in certain older metropolitan places. A fleet of conveyances equipped with comfortable seats, strong guard rails and banners lettered "see Chicago sin — Escorted by the Reverend Philip TCar' row" would do business . . . we'd buy the first ride. The service would prosper, because everyone knows that Mr. Yarrow knows all the places. He would thus effect their wholesale exposure, surely the surest means of closing them if he wished them closed, in which case others would open, as others always have opened, and in no time at all a nice new itinerary would be ready for second-timers. This could go on forever, and jolly well may for all we care. SAKS-FIFTH AVENUE CHICAGO Henry W ax man cJniroditcing The Emperatrice Eugenie Hat A picturesque revival that finds its perfect setting in modernism . . . Exclusive with Saks-Fifth Avenue if-iieuer ae C/arts STREET FLOOR North Michigan at Chestnut THE CHICAGOAN CHICAGO-BEFORE AND AFTER Which Seems to Cover About Everything By Drs. MISSEL PKATT and RANSOM SHERMAN, K.A., M.W. * ANNOUNCEMENT: You arc con- fronted, Ladies and Gentlemen, with the virgin exercise in print of The Three Doctors . . . Dr. Rudolph's con tribution pianissimo as usual. It may be read in tiuo ways, ivith varying suc cess. Try it first in the normal way. 7 hen have it read aloud and pizzicato by the butler or another English-speak ing member of the houseliold stationed in an adjoining room. Tell us which way you like it best and we'll tell you wh-at you are. — ed. WHEN we were asked by the editor of (fill in name of local paper or magazine) to write one thou sand free words on Chicago, we ac cepted with alacrity realizing that pub licity, either free or paid for, can do one no jot or tittle of harm. This is probably the first story ever written about early Chicago that does not in clude the Everleigh Sisters (however, we have only the highest regard for them) but we did want to be different in this story. Well, readers it seems as though every city must have an early period, and Chicago is no exception. It certainly had a most interesting "early" and woe is us that we were not here to enjoy it. As small lads we can remember standing on Michigan Avenue, doffing our little hats as Marshall Field and Levi Leiter used to go to work in the A. M. behind their coach and four or six . . . mostly they got down by eight. But what a sight. Always wc would cheer them as they swung along with the proud footman and coachman blowing the trumpets . . . and Wash ington Park where we all attended the derby . . . had we been born at that time . . . some of us still wear derbies out of respect to these fine fellows. And how well they look on us men. Later on it was not a rare sight to see the Potter Palmers as they walked along the Boulevards. Whether they were looking for business we shall never know, but they must have gotten it somewhere, else where would they get the silver dollars which they said were on the Palmer House floor which is a lie. We have classified the history of Chicago in three distinct periods or eras, namely, viz, i.e., (a) Art (b) Culture (c) Architecture (d) Civic Enterprise (e) Commercial endeavor (f) etc., etc. Reading from left to right (as a matter Drs. Pratt, Bundesen, Evans, Brady, Taking these up in order we will speak briefly on each one. Art: they probably had it. Culture: We are not informed on this. Architecture: Only as relates to buildings. Civic enter prises: Such as schools and so forth. Commercial Endeavor: Typographical error, should have been Christian En deavor. Etc., Etc. Those too. AND so gentle readers we find our selves in Chicago today. Streets, building trams, and oh a host of things. When we look back at early Chicago our hearts swell with something or other as we think of the trials and tribulations those hardy pioneers, or of fact, they have just finished reading): Nicholas Murray Butler and Sherman. pioneers as we called them, had to con' tend with. We express it this way : With crea\ing oxen wend our way The covered wagons oh so gay Knew them not they What we now Oh early Chicago of past. Someone has said "Chicago in the old days had no buildings, no streets, no boulevards, no trams, just nothing" . . . and where did they get? We'll say. [you are listening to a talk on Early Chicago by Pratt and Sherman R. A. and M. W.* The article con tinues.] And how Chicago has progressed! It is interesting to trace the growth of a city, we guess; our *Kadio Actors, Magazine Writers. 10 TUE CHICAGOAN own contention is this: Buildings are surely here to stay . . . business will never be transacted as it used to be. The up and coming people of today are used to elevators and telephones . . . they believe they are here for good. All right then . . . let's have them, for someone has said "man works from sun to sun . . . woman's work is never done." Our grandmother used to recite that. Damn sweet. But that was when Chicago was in its swabbling clothes. Oh you may laugh . . . they laughed at the Wright Brothers when they said we'd be flying in another ten years. Don't be a fool. Look at the Chicago river. Its hard, but look at it. Dirty isn't it? What are you gonna do about it Mr. Average Citi zen? Did the early Chicagoans have that river? For the nearest correct answer presented in the neatest fashion we will give three cheers. In case of ties all prizes will be duplicated. The way is open . . . will you take it? [The foregoing is the first of a series of two articles on Chicago past, present and future. The concluding article will appear in an early issue perhaps.] HOCKEY AND A TEA-FIGHT Onto the ice the players glide Each fortified In padded wool; The stadium is full Of cheering noise And every eye's upon The numbered boys. The starter whistles — the game is on. Like lightning flashes Each player dashes On flickering steel, With turbulent zeal They artfully whisk, And capture and guide The galloping disk Along the echoing frosted glass; And as they pass 'Good heavens, there's my wife. She mustn't find us here.' I note how quick Each hockey stick Is pivoted from side to side, And with what artifice the puck hits the net. The whistle blows — the game is won — But contestants are not done, For such amusing pastimes whet The appetite for actual fight; And so with oaths each gladiator wildly swipes Some foe with vehement delight, Some throat with eager handhold gripes. I cheer insanely with the crowd And cry aloud: ~Np wonder gods were fashioned after But then, To that dim inner me, With bitterness I say: To Thin\-to thin\ — that I \now only how to play With gossip over tea. — CHARLOTTE REYNOLDS. MORE OBSERVATIONS PENCILED ON A STIFF CUFF I'm not intrigued by Lake Shore Drive. At least, I say I'm not. Hell! I can't even scrape up rent For Cedar, Elm or Scott. Hookworms, To bookworms. May leprosy and pip befall The folks who never read at all. I hate gents, at bars, Who guzzle sidecars And mutter and hone About Alk Capone. Repent! It's Lent! A sotto voce damn for gad- Abouts who loll on sunny sand While I must write a Southern ad And get my sunburn second-hand. I never seem to tire Of a Scalyham or Wire. And I'm absolutely notty About any little Scotty. (Forgive that pseudo Ogden Nash. I do it bitterly — for cash.) —DALE FISHER. TUEO-IICAGOAN n WHY PALM BEACH? A Frank Report on Society's Winter Capital By COURTNEY BORDEN FOR many years I secretly nour ished a desire to visit Palm Beach. I listened enviously to the reports of wonderful things offered by this luxurious world-famed resort, and re gretted, not a little, that luck had not yet brought my steps toward this much coveted spot on Florida's east coast. Finally luck broke my way. I have seen Palm Beach. Thanks to thought ful friends, I have lunched and dined in such sacred precincts as the Ever glades, the Bath and Tennis, the Seminole; seen the interior of some of the lovely pink, or orange, or nile green plaster houses; and gambled at Bradley's. Now, thankfully, the bubble of that old desire has burst. Suddenly I feel pleased, elated, satisfied, and somewhat like Caesar must have felt when he announced: Veni, Vidi, Vici. For I went; I saw; and at last — with the exception of a passion for surf bathing — I conquered any further hankering for a winter spent in that incredibly luxurious spot — Palm Beach. FOR one good reason, it was the wind. It blew and blew until I imagined it would drive me mad. At night it blew through my dreams, and caused restless waking moments when I decided rain must be pouring down. It blew, and flung in every direction, the long tropical leaves of those state ly sentinels, the cocoanut, date, and Royal Palms. Outlined against the pale light of dawn they resembled weird and waving green plumes. And always they gave the unwelcome sound of steady rain. The wind never ceased. They tell me it had blown in that monotonous manner during a part of nearly every day all season. A sudden gale off Lake Michigan, in our so-called windy city, has never seemed half so disturbing as that steady, persistent, annoying, "blowing" from off the huge Atlantic. Somerset Maugham could undoubted ly depict a powerful psychological drama — the subject slightly different from Rain! — with the scene set upon those wind-swept shores; and give it the title of Wind. SECONDLY; the actual physical beauties of Palm Beach seemed to me fantastic, "made," and quite un real; as unreal and unlasting as a child's soap bubble after it has been lovingly floated off into space. The first sight of Palm Beach was very much like the first sip of a glass of fine champagne. It had a tingle, a sparkle, an expensive and thrilling luxuriousness that could be felt slipping 'way down inside somewhere. But soon, after the first few heady sips, it became a trifle less tingling, less intoxi cating and, in fact, not overly superior — after being opened for awhile — to a glass of good white wine. Or again, Palm Beach resembled the deep white delicious foam on a tall glass of beer. On a hot day it was pleasant and de licious, but nothing more than froth. Those exotic houses — replicas of imagined visions of the Arabian Nights or Venetian Palaces of the Doges — , the tropical foliage that surrounded them, their enchanting gardens and se cluded patios; they did not seem real, somehow. They seemed deliberately planned, constructed and carefully completed, all in order to charm for but a few short months and, of course, create an exquisite effect. In many cases, however, the effect was too blatantly grand to be termed in the least exquisite. The flat, uninteresting land on which they stand was not so long ago a truly untouched jungle dense with growing things, birds, and reptiles. And in a way the extremely urban sophistication of these homes — as such they are — seemed absurdly incon gruous with the rough sweep of the sea, the blowing white sands, and back of the town, and on either side, nothing but miles and miles of flat Florida swamps. TODAY there appears to be noth ing natural remaining, nothing in digenous or permanent, about Palm Beach. It is all effect. It has no ro mance, no history, and even its future 12 TI4E CHICAGOAN forty and sixty domestics! Good for the unemployed, undoubtedly! How ever, it seemed to me that the one re deeming feature behind all this fabu- lous display of worldly goods was the fact that many of these men, build ers of magnificent places, once peddled newspapers or sold shoe strings on some noisy street corner. That, at least, served as a visible reminder of the vast opportunities in our land. "Who was that gentleman 1 sazv you out riding with last night?" "That was no gentleman, that was Deputy Commissioner Scanlan.' depends on the always changeable and chameleon-like whims of men and women with great wealth. So far, when a tornado has come to uproot trees and buildings the damage has been hastily repaired. Such gloomy remind ers of encroaching elements are far too depressing. In fact it seems that the artificial beauty of Palm Beach has been guarded even more zealously than the vital gift of youth and beauty is guarded by a Garbo or a Dietrich — since, with no care, such beauty is fleeting. Thirdly; Palm Beach gave me a vio lent contempt for such shrieking dis plays of wealth. It is luxury to the nth degree. Foreigners, who visit the place, return to their London or Paris and believe implicitly that all America is like that. For instance, some of the pink palaces boasted of quarters for D ESPITE Palm Beach, there was place in Florida I liked one tremendously. It was a quiet and love ly white farm house, situated further North and inland about thirty miles from the coast, surrounded by a peace ful blue lake, palm trees, magnolias, arrd acres and acres of orange groves. All around it climbed a startlingly lovely and fragrant vine — the bignonia or flame vine — bright orange in hue. Out side my windows, each morning, a mocking bird sang. While in the love ly sun-flecked woods foxes and quail lay hidden; and cardinals darted hither and yon. There was something substantial — something very real — about this lovely farm set in the very heart of Florida. Motoring South along the marvelous highway to Palm Beach, covering some two hundred miles — part of which was miserable swamp, and part flat uncul tivated areas dotted here and there by mute signs of a deflated land boom, street posts staked out but no houses, hotels left to decay — -we saw fresh green clumps of cypress and graceful white egrets that, startled by our sud den approach, delicately rose from the ground and soared away. Later, on reaching the shore of the Indian River, we tasted the salt of the ocean and watched many comical pelicans com fortably settle their distorted shapes on the quiet waves. Nearby were hun gry cranes flying about in search of food, and ducks and gulls. These wild creatures were for many miles the only signs of life, except for an occasional sight of a single, pitiful, wooden shack, — unpainted, tumbling down — home of the poor Florida crac\er. In comparison to all this long stretch of unprofitable land, the resplendent Arabian Night's city of Palm Beach, with its myriads of avenues and ex pensive shops from all over the country, rose as unexpectedly as a Babylon in the center of a desert. But for one person the champagne taste of Palm Beach has gone quite flat. I think it was a lucky break. TI4ECMICAG0AN 13 "FELLOW CITIZENS, ETC. — ", The How, Why, When and Where of Campaign Speaking HAVING made up my mind that as one of the unemployed I had better do a little speech-making for An ton J. Cermak, I finally managed to offer my services to a committee at the Cermak headquarters. The committee, I am bound to say, was very doubtful. None of them knew anything about me, and when I told them I was a professor of English, they shook their heads. Professors, in a campaign, were kittle cattle. Of course, there was Charles E. Merriam, universally known around all political headquarters as "Merri- man"; but he was vaguely believed to be some kind of an "expert" and be sides he had been an alderman himself. I had never been anything, and never would be anything, except a professor. However, Mrs. Fairbank put in a word, and Frank Busch put in a word, and after all the experiment couldn't cost anything, now or later; and so finally I had notice to attend a meeting of prospective speakers in the City Hall Building, where we should be told something of the plan of campaign. When I reached the rendezvous on the fourth floor, a large, bare room full of collapsible wooden chairs, each one plainly marked with the name of the firm that had rented them out for the occasion, the room, the chairs, one plain wooden table, and I, were alone. It was the hour set in my an nouncement, however, so I waited. Presently two or three other prospective speakers drifted in, and then a dozen in a group. We looked at one another, vaguely curious, and set tled down to read news papers in two or three languages. Presently a young man came in with a pitcher of water and set it on the table. That looked like business. Now pros pective speakers entered in numbers. At twenty-five minutes after the hour set, the room was almost full. There must have been two hundred and fifty of us. In came men and women obviously of distinction, By JAMES WEBER LINN Frank Busch among them. Later I identified them: Alderman Kaindl, Judge Fisher, Mrs. Conkey, Clayton Smith, Judge Padden, Alderman Woodhull, a dozen others in a group. Judge Padden stood up at the table. The meeting was organized. FRANK, Leo and Mike, who were talking eagerly near me, sat up. An elegantly-dressed gentleman in a white silk neck-cloth, with a white handker chief sticking out from the breast pocket of his overcoat, took off the overcoat, and revealed another white handkerchief sticking out at the same angle from the breast-pocket of his coat. Smoke-wreaths hovering about us, from innumerable cigarettes and a few cigars, grew thicker. The dozen or fifteen women among us, white and colored, threw back their wraps with a simul taneous gesture. The meeting began. Alderman Kaindl spoke, giving us some clear, definite, and so far as I was concerned, essential information on Candidate Kaindl. Judge Fisher spoke. Frank Busch spoke. Mrs. Fairbank spoke. Others spoke, including a very stout gentleman who began by remark ing, "For a good many years as a cam paign talker I didn't mind at all having my time wasted by a lack of or ganization, but now I'm old and I'm cross, and I think speakers ought to have a little consideration," and then went on to make a humorous speech that Mark Twain could not have bettered. I was even called on to make a speech myself. With trembling voice I assured the company I had come to learn, not to inform; and the meet ing adjourned. I went out with my head high. I had been accepted as a campaign speaker. There followed three or four other smaller meetings, in which we were in structed in technique. Vast stores of information were placed at our dis posal; we were told, not what to say, but how to organize what we had to say, how to analyze crowd-psychology, how to co-operate. We began to com prehend the vast complexity of the ar rangements of a campaign Speaker's Bureau. I began to understand the meaning of the term, which we use so light-heartedly at the University of Chicago, "a liberal education." And then I was informed that to begin with, I was to speak over the radio. SPEAKERS over the radio, you un derstand, are not permitted to make their remarks ex tempore or from notes. You write out what you have 'Noiv, if hen I say GO! Enthuziazzuml 14 to say. Your copy is then submitted to a lawyer, who edits it. The edited copy is then submitted to the manager of the radio station, who further edits it if necessary. You are given the finally edited copy; and if while de livering it you deviate by so much as a sentence, even perhaps a phrase, from the copy which the announcer, standing near you, is following as you "talk," the announcer is instructed to "cut you out" at once, and substitute orchestral music. All this is by order of the na tional radio commission, which permits no station to take any chances on libel. All large radio-stations are much alike in their arrangements. Entering the reception-room of one, you find yourself in the midst of a hurly-burly. Maybe a dozen, maybe fifty people are sitting and standing about, talking in eager tones. Some of them have cases containing musical instruments; some of the women are wearing expensive coats; others are not. Keenfaced young men greet you, receive casually the information that you are So-and- So, inform you that Mr. Jones will take care of you when your time comes. Mr. Jones is your announcer, and an announcer is a radio-active obstetrician, trained to the one end of assistance in delivery. In and through everything sounds the program that is at the mo ment on the air from that station. In time you are summoned by Mr. Jones, and led into a huge room through a sound-proof door. Some stations have half a dozen smaller rooms, each with a microphone — studio 4, studio 6. But usually you are taken into the main studio. No talking there! On the floor is a composition that absolutely prevents your shoes from squeaking. Beyond is a heavy glass partition, and through that you see a small but in tensely curious audience of visitors gathered, to see how it is done. They hear through loud-speakers, but they can watch the performers in person. These visitors come and go as they like. Personally, I have seen more go than come. The instant you have finished your remarks, the announcer goes on, in your mike or another, and while you are tiptoeing out, another performer, or group of performers, is already on the air. You get your hat and coat, take your telephone calls if there are any, — sometimes a crank gets in first, some times a friend, you never know-rand pass on your way. SPEECHES "in person" are very different. The speaker is notified from headquarters to be at a particular place at a particular moment. The un pardonable sin is to fail to give notice if you cannot be there at the time set. A sin almost as unpardonable is to go late. Wherever you go, whether to a meeting of twenty people or a thou sand, the first thing to do is to make your presence known to the chairman, the next is to wait patiently. If, while you are speaking, no matter on what wings of eloquence you may be soar ing, or what closeness of argument you may be engaged in, if a candidate en ters, or even a "big shot" who happens to be on the program, you close your remarks as gracefully as possible, but immediately, and sit down. The speak ing is not for your benefit, but for the candidates. All remarks "in person" arc intend ed to give the impression of extern - poraneousness. You do not read, or even speak, you talk. That is, of course, ten times more difficult than radio-speaking. At the same time it has far more exhilaration. You feel freer, even if you have memorized your speech; you are conscious of a current of vitality passing between you and the audience; you can sense sympathy, which is inspiring, or hostility, which is more inspiring still, up to a certain point. I found that in radio-speeches, which I read from a manuscript, my mouth and throat grew dry and my voice reluctant in fifteen minutes, al- TI4E CHICAGOAN though every word I had to say was there before me; whereas in confront ing an actual audience, without having memorized what I had to say, without even a note in my hand, I was never worried, and my voice never wavered to a pitch I particularly did not want. To speak in a cause, or for a candi date, for which one is not particularly enthusiastic, must be incredibly weary ing. The inconvenience of the hours, the consciousness of the insignificance of one's efforts, the realization that in all human probability your own per sonal remarks never changed or even added a vote to your side, are none of them inspiring. But if you happen to believe in the cause or the candidate, there is no weariness in it at all. Though you are only a little cog in a big machine, you are a cog. Though you are the merest bit of fibre in a big right arm, you can feel that arm strik ing. The struggle becomes part of you. You march as a private in a grand re view, but you see the sun striking on the bayonets in the line ahead of you, and you know that yours is glittering tOO. AND all the time I was speaking, I l liked to think of a child brought to this country from Central Europe, growing up in my state, learning to work with his hands as well as with his brains; growing up further in my city, a great American city, still working with his hands, and with his brains; buying waste wood cheap, splitting it up into kindling, peddling that kin dling in the alleys, in the alley back of the house I lived in, making a little business grow finally into a big busi ness; studying law at night, taking ad vantage of American opportunities for education; marrying and settling down in a good neighborhood, making it a better neighborhood by his presence and the presence of his family; con scious all the time of two things, one that he was a man, with power and in telligence, and the other that he was an American, living in a country where every man with intelligence and power could get ahead. I liked to think of a man like that getting ahead, learning all the time, learning to organize, learning to co-operate, learning the only na tional slogan I believe in, America for all of us and all of us for America. Yes, that was part of one of my speeches; and it was because of that liking that I undertook the job of "Fel low Citizens, etc.," and enjoyed it, whatever the result may be. TWECMICAGOAN 15 TOWN TALK A Fortnightly Garland of Timely Frivolities By RICHARD ATWATER I HE dish garden counters are be- * coming crowded, hence this word of warning to thousands yet uncon scious of the new peril. If, when you get home tonight, you find reposing on your end table a Japanese-looking tableau that wasn't there in the morn ing, that's a dish garden. It might also be called a plate farm, a saucer ranch, or an uncooked vegetable dinner. People who formerly went in for goldfish bowls, or fish gardens, are now changing to dish gardens; for that matter, the two ideas can be neatly combined, by having a midget pool of water in your toy landscape, so the fishies can paddle about and keep an eye on the radish trees. We recommend calling this combination a wish garden, and letting pussy in the room to enjoy it. The dish garden will likely prove a harmless notion, except for making last years fad, miniature golf, look like hunting bears in Glacier National Park. But we wonder what the noted pioneer who left the state because an other family moved in fifty miles from his cabin would have thought of dish gardens. La Belle Marlene ANOTHER gift of the Hoover Era, and if we thought he was responsible for this novelty we'd vote for him in '32, is Marlene Dietrich. We hear her first name does not rhyme with Queen and Screen, so there goes a poem which would also have asked Miss Dietrich if she wouldn't like to meet Riq. Still, we suppose we can comment prosaically on this dazzling antidote to the limp ingenues, vacuous dolls, mincing man- nikins and other sentimental mice brought forth previously by Mount Hollywood. A sceptic, of course, might still wonder how much of the Marlene of the Blue Angel, Morocco and Dis honored is Dietrich and how much is producer Von Sternberg. But what does it matter, so long as this happy combination continues? And why be sceptic anyway before this gift of the Hoover era? Let us rather sit enrap tured before her lovely cynic smile, the calculating lightning of her eyes, the cool cruel witchcraft that is her Lilith's legacy. [Pause, to catch our breath.] That this is Art indeed, mesdames et messieurs, an Art as old as Cleo patra but still rather a novelty on Mr. Will Hays' silver screen, may be cold ly shown by inspecting La Dietrich in those rare moments which her pro ducer has shrewdly allowed the film cutter not to remove: the moments when her face is impassive, not with the glamoured heartlessness of La Belle Dame Sans Merci, but impassive with the look of a Hausfrau wonder ing which windows to wash next. Then the next moment comes, and once more the daughter of Semiramis mocks the victims of her practiced wiles. It may be premature to announce that with the first twisted smile of the cabaret girl in the Blue Angel, fifteen thousand simpering blondes were out of work in California while Miss Clara Bow took up the study of knit ting. Let us, instead, look forward with critical restraint to a coming su per-picture containing not only la belle Marlene but the Dita Parlo of Meloch'e des Herzens, too. And there, Mr. Hays, is something to make you join us in dancing the tango with roses in our hair. P. S. — We wish the war veterans on the street corners could have found time to see Morocco. They'd have got a real kick out of Marlene singing "What Am I Bid for My Apples." SOMETHING ought to be done in aid of an esteemed colleague, Gail Borden of the Times. As it is, he has had to take to aeroplane riding, to get away from readers of his paper who have somehow got the idea their columnist is a lady. The psychology back of this strange delusion puzzled us for quite a while, as neither Mr. Borden nor his column are, we would have thought, in the least feminine. We think we've got it. Readers of the Times, being intel ligent rather than intellectual, think Gail must be an abbreviation for Abi gail. Or maybe for Farthingale. The only way of clearing up this error that we can think of is to pub lish the following verse for Times readers to memorize: There was a young Borden named Gail, A hero both hearty and hale: If you'd give him a pain, Just make him explain That he really and truly is male. Speaking of Abbreviations THE abridgement "Pro.", for "Professor," in our last number, was unintentional, at least on our part. "Pro," as everyone knows, is the ab breviation for "professional." Profes sors are notably amateurs, at least one seldom hears of professional profes sors, though why not, at that? On the other hand (after waving the other hand debonairly at the lady who said "Never use an abbreviation, because abbreviations are a sign of haste; and haste, my dear child, is vulgar") , the usual abbreviation "Prof." is eminently ridiculous; almost as much so as the full title of Profes sor. Why not make it "Prf."? "Prf." is dignified and makes you think of "preferred," a sound, dividend paying 16 TUE CHICAGOAN So fciu men realize zvhal an ethereal thing a ivoman's spirit is. word. "Prf. Smith will not meet his classes today." What could be better? Two Pictures No Astist Could Paint ONE: Overseer Wilbur Glenn Voliva of Zion City, listening on his home radio to Rudy Vallee singing "My Cigaret Lady." Two: Ogden Nash and Corey Ford, chatting together about the lat est Buicks. "All, Sweet Mystery of Life — " RADIO, we hear, is cutting down on the astrologers, perhaps an other symptom that business is picking up. The depression was certainly hay making time for the wizards: seldom has the nation seen such a revival of interest in fortune-telling as followed the November after Mr. Coolidge thoughtfully left the White House. Newspapers throughout the Republic opened up daily star-consulting depart ments as soberly as they had previously given space to cooking recipes. Occa sionally an especially excited reader would daringly enter the newspaper office for a personal call on the as trologer, and that mage would have to wrap a hasty towel about his head so as to look the part of an authentic wise man of the Orient. The nightly air became even funnier with its thronged and helpful voices, usually on the more crowded and unsophisticated portions of the dial, answering one and all of those perplexing personal ques tions that can only be answered by students in psychic engineering. It was rather fun to hear these magical answers to souls distressed with the usual human problems of money and sex, and we rather hope they won't all disappear from the en tertaining ether. To the pensive lis tener, the low wave-length Merlin with his Arabic name and Chicago ac cent was frequently food for thought. It was interesting to learn what mighty sciences he had studied to gain his strange power over the future: as trology, numerology, telepathy, psy chology, things to conjure with indeed. To learn that the telephone number of such a scholar occasionally coincided with that of a beauty parlor was itself stimulating to the mind. Of all these benevolent super-scien tists, we liked especially one who worked his wonders, (in Hammond, if wc recall him rightly,) by telepathy. Merely by asking you to concentrate as you sat by your radio, he could im mediately recite your name in full, your post office, your street address, house numbers and all. His powers were such that he performed this feat as easily as if he had received an ac tual letter of inquiry and were holding it in his hands beside the microphone. Another, in Chicago, sometimes de nied allegiance to any powers of dark ness other than applied psychology. It was only through a mutual acquaint ance that wc learned he privately found the psychology seemed more ef fective if he wore an astrologer's gown at the microphone. Another Indiana wizard apparently relied on the magic phrase "it seems" as his talisman. His recitations followed this formula: "I get Mrs. Ruby Jones, of Chicago. That's South Shore Drive. 7861 South Shore Drive, it seems. I get Mrs. Ruby Jones asking — Concentrate, please, Ruby. It seems, it seems you want to know whether your child will be a hoy or a girl. That's what you want to know. It seems. It seems. It seems your wishes are going to come true, Mrs. Jones. In two or three weeks. Inside of three weeks, Mrs. Jones, it seems it will be a boy. Everything is going to be all right, Ruby, it seems, that's the answer I get to your question, Ruby — " There was a real thrill in hearing, out of the night, such competent ad vice as "go back to your farm, Charles, that's where it seems your best chance of success is, back on the farm," or "Don't do nothing about it for three weeks, Mrs. Epstein, that's what I get for you," or to learn, with Myrtle Benson of Downer's Grove, that the lost ring would be found in the powder puff. The only thing we FWE CHICAGOAN 17 never understood was why we never found one of these astrologers speaking to a muted pipe-organ background. Occasionally the wizard would go whimsical for a moment. Thus, one Eddie, after long and exact instruc tions as to his future handling of a cer tain stock on the market, was finally warned to stand on his own feet and quit taking advice from other people all the time. And once there was William Somebody, who had asked: "I am going with two girls, Edna and Margaret. I cannot decide which one I want to marry. Who will be the lucky girl?" "Conceited, aren't you, William?" rebuked the mage. "Edna will be the lucky girl. You are going to marry Margaret." So radio is going to cut down on the astrologers. Oh, well. They were great while they lasted. Song for Woodwinds Lie if you may on fine linen resting In a soft white feather bed; Lie if you must under elm tree nesting With wood leaves for your head: Sleep will come with a dreamy smiling To ta\e you by the hand And carry you off with her ways be guiling To far-off slumberland. REFRAIN Dreamily rustle, branch of the wilhw, Softly sing, summer breeze; 'Night lies down on her woodland pillow Under the murmuring trees. Dreamily roc\s, high over the hill-0 The moon as her lantern beams; Dreamily rustle, branch of the willow, To a world in a cradle of dreams. Dee- Oh - Gee Department LJOWARD MANN, of the Hews, * A was pretty tickled the other night when Mrs. Mann commanded that sport editor to go out to the kitchen and take the dog's bee-oh-cn- knee away from him. Later, Howard offered the incident to Miss June Pro- vines as a slight but illuminating anecdote of modern society. Miss Provines didn't think it was funny. The only way she can get away from her dog, she said, without its barking, was to go for an announced douhlc- you-aye-ell-kay. Mr. Mann, now equipped with two anecdotes on the same topic, still later offered them to your reporter, who after a slight smile was prepared to announce (1) that Riq has no dog, (2) but knows one and (3) this dog cannot be fooled by such transparent devices of canine deception. Hearing the signal scc-ayc-en-dee-why, he sits up and begs for it; the code message bce-aye-tee-aitch sends him worriedly under the chair farthest from the bathtub. Somebody out at the Midway might well write a dissertation on Dogs an J their Sense of Spell. For his dogtor's degree, of course. zAwah OTIS SKINNER'S frequent pained cries of "Awah!" in the recent revival of Kismet seemed to please Chicago audiences very much. Apparently we were the only one, however, to notice that the beggar Hajj's appeals for Arabic coin sounded anything at all like "Amos, for the love of Allah, Amos!" Herodotus Outdone COMMENDED reading: If, Or History Rewritten, by some eleven eminent thinkers, from Andre Maurois and Winston Churchill to Hilaire Belloc and G. K. Chesterton, and neatly printed by the Viking's presses. These fascinating speculations as to what might have been, had things hap pened only slightly differently, are high fantasy. More, they are delight fully plausible, and by the time you have read two or three chapters you are convinced that the difference be tween truth and fiction has been great ly exaggerated. The writers have taken their amus ing assignments seriously, and the logical structures they build on their false premises (but are they false, even though they didn't happen?), will 'Them gloves ain't gold — they're pewter!' 18 THE CHICAGOAN make the next novel you read sound pretty thin. Or the next history textbook. If the Three Doctors ^Announced Toscanini IS THERE any use going on with this broadcast? — I don't think so, my friend. — In that case, ladies and gentlemen, it is with no great pleasure that we bring you today as the opening mumble of the New York Philhar- monica orchestra — — Wait a minute. You forgot to dedicate the orchestra to Henrici's restaurant. — Consider it done, my friend. Un der the direction, ladies and gentle men, of Arturo Ben Bernie — — What king's horses? — Wayne King's horses, I presum ably. Continuing, my friends, we shall proceed with the first mumble. I bet you can't guess what this is. Yes, sir, it's the celebrated Clock Symphony of that truly great — truly great — — Sir to you, my friend. — Thanks, that's it. Sir Edward Elgin was the name that had escaped my mind in four movements. — Announce the number. — The number you now hear, my friends, is the sound of the eminent conductor, Doctor Toscanini, walking across the stage in four movements. — Oh. Then it isn't the king's horses. — Decidedly, my friend, not. Have you forgotten that the first movement of this celebrated sympathy is allegro, the second movement, allegro con trippo, the third movement allegro in scherzo and the fourth movement, alle gro — correction. We now find that the movements are largo, not allegro. — Largo. What's a largo? — Oh, stuff and nonsense, you know what largos are as well as I do. You know. Hark, hark, the largo. ¦ — Oh, to be surely. A hunting we will largo. — Seriously, my friend, sir, is it any time for that? Announce the pro gram, and at once. ¦ — I think it would be better if we got Mr. Downes, the celebrated music critic of the New York Chimes, to ex plain the sympathy. — Very well, if. that's the way you feel about it, very well. You will now listen, my friends, to Mr. Downes. — Ups and Downes. — Turn as many somersaults as you like, sir, my friend. — Thank you, Mr. Knight. — Mr. O'Day, to you. —To me, my friend, the clock sym pathy we are now now about to hear from the orchestra always brings to my mind, the image of a clock. A clock, ticking away remorselessly. — I thought he invented the tele graph. — The clock, I think, my friend, if you will pardon me. —That's right, he did. S. F. B. Morse. He did invent the clock. — -You'll have to prove it to me, in my mind. — His very name shows it, my friend. Look at it. What a name. S. F. B. Morse, the clock maker of Waterbury. — To my mind, doctor, that proves very little. — Ah, but doctor, examine the evi dence. S. F. B. Morse. S for Slow. F for Fast. B for Bell. A gentleman to the last, that veteran clockmaker. The old Morse code. Slow, Fast, and a Bell rings. — Doctor, your analysis convinces me. And now, as Signor Toscarora is rapping with his baton — — Pardon me, my friend. You mean he is unwrapping his baton. Look, there comes the wrapping paper. He's distributing it to the musicians for their sheet music. Look. He's down, he's up, he's up, he's down — ¦ — You have listened to Mr. Downes, ladies and gentlemen, and the orches tra will now give you the celebrated Clock Symphony of Sir Edward El gin, play by play. — Ding, dong, ding, dong. — And now the brilliant allegro movement. — Ding dong, ding dong. Ding dong, ding dong. — This is the Columbia — — Ding dong, ding dong. Ding dong, ding dong. Ding dong, ding dong. — And coming to you over station — — Ding dong, ding dong. Ding dong, ding dong. Ding dong, ding dong. Ding dong, ding, dong. — You can't fool me, I've heard that symphony before, somewheres. — I hope you liked it. — To be honest, my friend, I did not. — What would you rather like, my friend, if the question be not too apropos? — Well, my friend, I will tell you, I would much rather see Marlene Dietrich. — My goodness, doctor, who wouldn't? — Greta Garbo, mayhaply, sir, I guess. — Owing to a mechanical difficulty in our Chicago studio, in Cincinnati, at the next time signal you will hear the name of the lucky company which is advertising this wonderful program by these three fine fellows — — Three little wordsmen. Ha, ha. Get it? Three little wordsmen. — Now that I look at you closely, I do seem to see circulars under your eyes. — Not circles, my friend. Those are toothpicks. And they are not un der my eyes. They are over my eyes. Most people have dots over their eyes but I have toothpicks. See your ocu list at least twice a year. — Oh, have it your way. — What isn't? — What isn't what isn't? — Isn't what what isn't? — Anchors, I guess. [They then sing Anchors Aweigh, and the program continues indefinitely, I guess.] zAccolade PROBABLY Franco-American, cer tainly Franco-Chicagoan diplo matic relations were cemented by sev eral new rivets lately, when Robert Andrews and some two dozen ~News colleagues gave a farewell dinner to Claude Caspar- Jordan, for the preced ing twelvemonth a smiling guest to these shores and that journal. It was an occasion indeed, toastmastered by that genial French war veteran, Cap tain Morgan, eloquent under crossed flags in a Loop Italian restaurant with tenor and accordeon, Maestro Piccolo himself further obliging with a stanza of the Marseillaise, a salute to Mon sieur Jordan, and a distribution of cigars. Not to be outdone, attorney George Schneider made several speeches, one apparently in French. It was M. Jordan, our readers will remember, who during his first week in Chicago reproved a local bartender for the undrinkable quality of his beer, refused to pay for it, and walked out unriddled by machine-gun bullets: what a tale he will have to tell in Paris of the decadence of Chicago gangdom may well be imagined. THE CHICAGOAN 19 THE RIVER THAT RUNS BACKWARDS The title, li\e the photograph, is by Mr. Paul L. Ritten- house, whose camera is his companion on bienniel jour neys to the South of France and whose pictures grace photographic exhibitions throughout the world . . . this one has adorned the galleries of five nations. One of those unfortunate individuals who cant draw a line, and therefore could not be an originating artist, Mr. Ritten- houses early passion for etchings and mezzotints led him by devious ways to the glad discovery that, with due allegiance to the simple laws of composition and pattern, and with minimum regard for the physical characteristics of lenses and plates, he could please his own memory through the camera. Other results of this discovery will be published in subsequent issues. 20 THE CHICAGOAN THERE were a lot of dogs there at the old First Regiment Armory last week — hundreds of them, in face more than forty breeds were exhibited in the rings before the Chicago Kennel Club's judges. There were more Wire Haired Fox Terriers on the benches than any other breed. And there were a lot of Chows and Doberman-Pinschers and sporting dogs — Setters, Spaniels, Retrievers, Pointers, Springer, Bealges, Chesapeake Bays. Other terrier breeds, too, were present, and working breeds, toys and non-sporting breeds. You should have been there. Probably you were. We wandered about for awhile in specting this breed and that and occa sionally watching the activities in the rings. Then, following Harvey Wood ruff's example of interviewing Derby- entries, we interviewed a few ring entries. FRI2T von der TORPEDO- STADT, as handsome a Schnauzer as you've (or we've) ever seen, seemed friendly, so we shot some questions at him. Fritzt's English was bad and our German was bad, but we were both in good humor. "How do you think you'll like Ameri ca?" we asked Frizt. "I think American women are won derful. Ewig-Weibliche, always. So chic, so lovely ..." "Isn't it though?" we said. "And wnat, Frizt, do you think of our Ameri can women?" "Such high, yes? buildings in your great city. K[icht Wahrl So lovely corner stones. Such parks. Such trees: zum beispiel: your populars, maybe, which we do not have in my native land, I think." "Yes, indeed," said we. "We sort of like 'em, too. And now, what about our buildings, parks, drives and such perfectly civic things? What do you think of them?" "I am sorry. I love your stockyards," replied Frizt. "Such grand smells, you know. I have been sorry that I cannot live there, but my diet calls for only thirty-five per cent meat. Ah, well, was man nicht \ann meiden, muss man wil- lig leiden, as we say in my native land." "Well," said we, preparing to leave, "muchas gracias, Frizt." "L'union fait la force," replied Frizt. "That's French." "Isn't it though?" Frizt responded. CHICAGOANA All Members cf This Kennel Club By DONALD PLANT and PHILIP NESBITT r^L .^€^ The yipes have it. And here Philip Xcsbilt has caught a few of the Dog Show dogs on disftC'- were writing an article about fashionable equipment for dogs we might have a lead paragraph l breeds and only say in passing off the loiccr right-hand corner that there is Francis X. Busht,nn B UT Frizt's continental mannerisms didn't down us. Not a bit of it. We walked around to the benches of the Wire Haired Fox Terriers. And a fine looking crowd they were! Ac tive, lithe, merry, eager to play or fight. One yiped at us, directly at us, as we passed, and wagged his tail. He wanted, we thought, to be questioned. Strath- way Rail Black Douglas was his name. "Would you rather be digging out badgers than be here?" we asked The Douglas. "Sure," he replied. "The old badger game. Great sport, that." "Tell me," we said, thinking of our own Wire, "are you a gcxid dragger?" '"Yes, I consider myself a very fair sort of dragger. Why?" "Oh, we were just wondering. What do you drag? Galoshes?" "Yes, usually. That is, I prefer drag ging galoshes." "Humh. And do you drag them up on your master's bed?" "Why, uh, that is, well, yes, I guess I do sometimes. Say, what is this?" "Muddy galoshes?" we asked. "Shall I speak frankly?" "Please do." THE CHICAGOAN 21 "Well, yes. It's more fun if they're a bit muddy." "Just how muddy must they be to suit you?" "Well," said The Douglas, "I'm glad you asked that question. I like my . on leashes and on pretty good behavior. If we M as it is we shall not name names nor familiar and hxs great Great Dane. galoshes pretty muddy. Not wet mud, you understand, nor dry mud, but just a sort of sticky mud with enough con sistency to last till I get 'em up on the bed spread; so it will not come off on the carpet on the way down the hall." And how do you get them out of the hall closet without your master knowing?" "Oh, I usually do that sort of work while the family is at dinner." "You're pretty good at it?" "Yes, I think I may safely say I am." 'You always manage to get the nice, clean bed spread thoroughly muddied?" "Usually. Though sometimes I'm in terrupted." "I suppose you find such stuff great sport?" "Yes, it's work getting a heavy galosh up on the bed, though. But once it's up there and I can drag it all around over the spread I think this old life is pretty much worth living after all." "Well," we said, "thanks a lot. This conversation has been very enlight ening." "That's all right," said Strathway Rail Black Douglas. "Glad you stopped by. It's nice to meet someone who un derstands about things I like." E walked around to the aisle where the Scottish Terriers bounced and barked. Laird of Glent- worth looked like an agreeable fellow. We stopped and drew forth our pencil and copy paper. "When do you face the judges, Laird?" we asked. "I do na ken," he said somewhat stiffly. "Th' air I gae, th' better." "You would rather be doing some thing else?" "Aye," replied the Laird. " 'T would be ma fun to be awa' aff fro' th' clud wi' th' master an' th' bairn an' wi' ain adaffin' a ba' for me to kep. Aye." "Yes," we agreed. "It probably would, at that." "Aye. 'T is sport here a' first, but bein' here lane sa much ain gets a bit canker." "I see, and after the show you'll have a good rest, won't you?" "Aye, an' a ait, grand enough to fu' ma gab an' ma baggie, wi' baiks an' great banes. 'T will coom when ma darg f dane, when th' dackering i' over, aiblins." "Well, let's hope so," we said and moved awa'. Open Letter The following letter came to us from a friend of ours who is a friend of Brother Ozmun's. Immediately it fell into our hands we read it and clapped them. An accompanying note from the donor states that he has per mission from Mr. Ozmun "who because of great equanimity of temper ament, has no reaction of offended dig nity" (nor has he the slightest idea as to the identity of the writer) for us to reprint the letter "for the edification and possibly betterment" of our read ers. But here is the letter. 670 W. Washington Blvd. Chicago, 111. Dear Brother Ozmun: You, no doubt, have already heard of the whirlwind campaign I make each summer in the CHASTE and HOLY cause of Temperance. My most popular and famous speeches, much praised by the W. C. T. U., have been "Booze and Belial," "Vol stead and Virtue," "Rum or Religion," and "There is no Corkscrew in Christianity." Thousands of former mis-guided mortals are now converted to temperance due to my efforts alone. I need your help. Will you give it to me? In conjunction with my lecture, I have on the stage with me, what I call my "object lesson." He sits on a chair beside me and I pathetically point him out to the audience as an example of the ravages of drink. For years, Clarence Fortescu has been my loyal support in the great cause, but this winter as a natural result of his vicious habits Clarence passed on and I will need another man to accompany me on my usual summer tour. The Keeley Hospital and the A. I. C. P., have referred me to you as being best fitted to take poor Clar ence's place. For God's sake, Mr. Ozmun, help me. Yours in the Cause, (Signed) Rev. Samuel Purdue, c/o DuBois. Testimonymakers Violet Heming, Libby Holman, Miriam Hopkins, Marilyn Miller, Jean Dixon, Evelyn Herbert, Jessie Royce Landis, Betsy Rees, Linda Watkins, Margaret Perry, Claiborne Foster, Myrtle Clark, Zelma O'Neal, Sally Bates, Isabel Jeans, Spring Byington, Helen Flint, Elise Bartlett, Katherine Wilson, Bettina Hall, Helen Hayes, Veree Teasdale, Anne Forrest and Frances Williams Use flux Of Lux. But Ashton Stevens Evens That score Or more By suprising- Ly advertising His belief In Marshall Field 6=? Company's, Wholesale, Boulevard handkerchief. 22 THE CHICAGOAN Start the day right... 'atisfies as nothing else does — just before breakfast — a long, cool drink of the original College Inn Tomato Juice Cocktail. Adds zest to the rest of the meal — cheer to the rest of the day. The reason . . . College Inn Tomato Juice Cocktail is made of whole, ripe, juicy, red tomatoes — Indiana's finest — hand-picked at the top of the season and blended into a delicious cocktail — not over-spiced. College Inn's fa mous chefs do the job to perfection. America's favorite "self starter" ... at your dealer's. THE ORIGINAL TOMATO JUICE COCKTAIL College Inn Food Products Co. Randolph at Clark, Chicago 415 Greenwich Street, New York WHEN "WHOOPEE" WAS Moody Reflections on a Gaudy Era By WALLACE RICE BEFORE the Everleigh Club was enlarged and refurnished, con siderably later, Carrie Watson's place in South Clark just beyond Polk was quite the most notorious of its notori ous kind in all this part of the country and for many miles roundabout, afford ing as it did a sort of post-graduate course for those who obtained bacca laureate degrees in the rest of the in stitutions of similar kind but less degree. At the time the first edition of The Sporting and Club House Di rectory was compiled and published in 1889 by Messrs. Ross and St. Clair its position was secure, and so remained until it went down in the general rout of all such places in 1911; during the World's Fair in 1893 visitors to the two exhibitions left the outer world reeking with its odors. In an earlier number it has been shown how Harry Justin Smith was inspired by the lair of the Sisters Everleigh to something akin to the writing of fine English; and, lest this leave the reader unduly prejudiced in favor of their resplendent joint, some thing should be quoted from Ross and St. Clair about its one rival, in which the English gets even finer. What Mr. Smith and his superior vocabulary would have done with this other sub ject will remain food for eager conjec ture, yet some notion can be obtained by listening to the earlier prose lyric. It will be given in full here, while Chicago: A History of Its Reputation will allow comparisons to be made. Now, as they say, listen! "Carrie Watson, 441 South Clark Street. Twenty boarders; rate, $5 to $50; pool rooms, billiard rooms, wine and beer. In fact everything and plenty of it. This is one of the most widely known 'Sporting' Houses in the United States or Canada. Nothing west of the Alleghaneys [sic] begins to compare with it in brilliance or mag nificence. In the basement are the bil liard and pool rooms, with perfect appointments. On the first floor are five parlors and a music room (at the latter of which competent musicians an: constantly in attendance) and these par lors defy description. One sees the first and one exclaims 'magnificent.' One sees the second and one exclaims more magnificent.' One sees the third and one murmurs in an ecstasy of delight, 'this is certainly the most magnificent' for the decorations in this parlor are arranged with an ingenuity almost di vine. But one has not yet finished. A moment in the brilliantly lighted cor ridor, resplendent with bronze and crystal decorations, and one is ushered into the far and justly famed 'Mikado Parlor,' with its four walls and ceiling composed of solid French-plate mir rors. This idea as applied to decora tions is a conception, the boldness of which makes it worthy of the gods. The English language is inadequate to describe the feeling of one who enters this enchanted bower for the first time. One looks, as it were, at an in finity of space, peopled with one's own image duplicated a million times [which makes two million] and one can but catch one's breath with a sort of mental shudder and stand utterly powerless. The hand that writes this grows palsied at the recollection, and these lines, if longer drawn out, will end in an inky blur. The upper floors are equally magnificent and must be described by an abler pen than ours. "Miss Watson's is an establishment to which nothing can be added. One has but to ask for what one wants, and they [the only slip on one, which leaves it almost a record] get it, no matter what it may be. Miss Wat son's is The House of the West, and as such should be the Mecca [here is a slip in superlatives; the houris were in the Moslem Paradise, not in Mecca] of all male tourists. Her boarders arc of such a variety that any taste is sure to be suited, and no living human being ever went away from the house dissatisfied. By all means call on Miss Watson before you leave Chicago." IT makes no difference what the writer of that was paid for it; it was worth it and more. Yet, oddly enough, he left out one feature. In the basement were also bowling alleys, and it was on these that one young Chicago gentleman devised an effective TUE CHICAGOAN 23 A WAR CRY aid to getting rid of an inherited $80,000 in less than a year, anticipat ing by years George McCutcheon's Brewster's Millions, by using mag nums of Piper Heiseck frappe instead of pins; the effect was almost that of Niagara when the bottles broke for a spare or a strike. The young gentle man was in earnest about it, and like others who are single minded, twelve months of it broke him too. He is still living and, though he has drunk nothing intoxicating since, he has never been a prohibitionist. It was one of Miss Watson's young ladies, of Italian descent, who was taken for a drive out to Downing's road-house, near Rose Hill, one sum mer evening, by a man prominent on the Board of Trade. He shell-roaded her — the expression is an old one that came up the river from New Orleans, whose celebrated Shell Road was long ago described as being "straight as an arrow, hard as flint, and smooth as a backgammon board." But the road the girl had to take in those days was none of these. With an occasional lift on a market wagon, she reached her place exhausted. A physician was called, she was given recuperatives, bathed, and put to bed. The next afternoon she rose and dressed, went to the door of the man's room in the Palmer House, and shot him to death when he opened it. The trial was almost of the order of twentieth-century murder trials, and the girl was acquitted, the feeling be ing general that the man got only what was coming to him. An unusual sequel was in the number of homes of fered the girl by women of social prominence. But she refused them all, took the money that poured in upon her, went to St. Louis, and there opened a house of her own, dying rich many years afterward. All this was before the days of Freud. DEVOUT WISH OF COLUMN READERS AND RADIO LISTENERS I wish Ben Bernie, the 01' Maestro, With his orchestra would out west go- — DAVID H. KENISTON. An Ensemble of Pearl Grey Mara via with its effec= tivc beaded decoration in pastel shades and full cuffs of Platinum Fox serves to illustrate that Personality in Style" which is evidenced in the creations of iLGm New York Miami Beach Detroit ^*^ Cleveland OOO Michisan Boulevard, South Chicago 24 TME CHICAGOAN TOPCOATED By JERREMS English Topcoats, as well as those which are fash ioned by Jerrems in this country, are notably aligned with the require ments of men and young men of metropolitan taste. The prices, for either town or country models, are pleasantly persuasive. '45 and more Chicago London New York Los Angeles THE STAGE Coquette Among the Britishers By WILLIAM C. BOYDEN WHENEVER the advance billing heralds the approach of a cast containing Henry Stephenson, you can be sure you will observe some stylish evening clothes, whiskey-and-sodas ad lib., a bit of tea, plenty of British "rightos" and oodles of intrigue in high places. Mr. Stephenson is most awfully good at this sort of thing, old bean. In fact, he's quite top-hole. All of which is no way to announce that Miss Helen Hayes is starring in a play called Petti coat Influence at that frightfully decent little playhouse, the Harris. In candor, one must confess that it is unlikely Miss Hayes would do much with this vehicle, were it not for the aforesaid Stephenson and a couple of other jolly Thespian cousins from across the seas. While the charming little lady is too accomplished an actress not to project considerable appeal across the footlights in any part, she is not espe cially happy in this ritsy yarn about the efforts of a spritely English wife to ob tain a colonial post for her ambitious husband. She is utterly unBritish and allows the suave Mr. Stephenson to take the play away from her in the best scenes of the show. Such has been the fate of many actresses as put up against the polished urbanity of this most facile- farceur. He is in great demand by stars, but by his very excellence an indictment of the star system. If the presence of the notable actor so fulsomely referred to did not tip off the nature of the entertainment, a glance at the dramatis personae would do as well. There is the Earl of Darna- way, Lord Algie, Reggie the amorous secretary, a maid called Daincourt and Talbot the old family butler. Tradition ally these Mayfair swankers need only a grist of verbal sparkers and a few high-toned adulteries to make up an amusing evening. While Neil Grant's smartities are not so good as the actors make them sound, they serve. And the situations, not nearly so deft as in, say, The Command to Love, contain some sufficiently intriguing complications. The other supporting Anglicans of merit are John Williams, a good type for the popular conception of an Eton ian, and Eric Cowley, an ideal British dead-pan of the deader sort. A topping evening, even if Miss Hayes is a bit topped by those most frightfully clever chappies with her. £x-Beef Trust THERE is good coarse fun to be had these nights at the Blackstone. Tracy Drake, the Chicago Belasco, has imported a trio of grand old troupers for the leads, held over a few torch- songers, recruited some local talent and knocked together a very decent per- formance of Stepping Sisters. This ribald uproar purports to answer the question of what has happened to the ladies who used to carry spears in burlesque when a shank was a shank, and breasts were bosoms. Or, to steal a gcxid line from the show, "when men were men, and women were glad of it." Blanche Ring yes, she sings Yip- Aye-Addy and Rings on My Fingers by way of interlude and to the ex pressed delight of even our sombre crit ics-has "gone Southhampton" after an early career under the management of Billy Watson or some other Glorifier of the American Curve. Agreeing to entertain a couple of performers at a charity benefit, she finds her guests arc a pair of old cronies from the Star and Garter days. One is Helen Raymond, now Lady Regina Chetworth-Lynde, the great Shakespearian reader, but not above a drink or three; the other Grace Huff, still a rough-and-ready performer who has amassed $200,000 "by weep ing into her beer." These three old- timers play their parts with rich gusto, stirring in our effete minds the memory of lustier days days when sin was sin, and not a neurosis. Nothing subtle here, just the joyous vulgarity of broad hokum, generously dished out. Of local interest is the appearance of Donald Briggs, cx-Goodmanite, power ful enough to tour under Rockne, yet cast as a fairy. What a pity, with so many nice boys out of work! But young Mr. Briggs does well in the role and spares the audience that itch to toss a tomato which such characters often inspire. Joan Blair and Arthur Shaw from The Torch Song are as good as two nondescript parts allow them to be. But the Misses Ring, Raymond and Huff arc the roast-beef at the feast. TI4ECUICAG0AN 25 130 Pounds of Flesh GUY BATES POST is back at the Apollo in a drama which might be called Shyloc\ with a Monocle or Omar the Pawnbro\er, but which, in fact, goes under the title of A Lady in Pawn. As the producer and co-author is our popular fellow-townsman, Ralph Kettering, it would be pleasant to chronicle that the play is a wow. Un fortunately honesty decrees otherwise. The first alternative title suggested would refer to the story, a moderne conception of Shakespeare's fable of hard dealing on the bourse. "Twenty Percent" Israel, a dressy old Shylock, wears smart white flannels while he lends the juvenile $100,000 on the pledge of the lad's wife; dons a well- fitting dinner jacket to plot the young couple's ruin; and appears resplendent in full evening dress to foreclose on the collateral. The idea is preposterously melodramatic as a whole, and in detail the business angles are more weird than Pond's wildest dreams. My other title refers to Mr. Post's acting. Fifteen years ago he toured profitably as the famous Tent-maker. His Omar was no more deliberate, world-weary and la2;y than his Israel The only energy the star displays con sists in continual gravitation towards the center of the stage. The result is a slowness of pace which might have killed a much better play. Lillian Kem- ble Cooper, who looks but does not act like her sister (or cousin) Violet, and Ian Emery are thoroughly ham. The best acting of the evening is done by William H. Sams, as a lawyer who produces contracts out of his sleeve with all the deftness of a Thurston. A Lady in Pawn may be redeemed in the play, but A Lady in Pawn is un redeemed as a play. Deep in Our Hearts THE STUDEHT PRIHCE may be counted one of the good things of life — like a Tom Collins after a game of tennis, the smile of a child or a kiss by moonlight in June. As well ask a German whether he enjoys a foaming mug of Hofbrau as to enquire from a play-goer whether he likes this mellow and melodious tale of Springtime and Love. My banal taste in music finds its ultimate satisfaction in the lush lilt of Romberg. You, more cultured reader, may have your Prokofieff and your Stravinsky. This preludes the confes sion that my recent visit was my sixth time at the operetta. After all, Karleton • THE INSIDE STORY OF CARLIN Sian£0*COMFORT£RS • It is no longer necessary to take for granted the unseen filling of your comforter, or to risk impurities in those of obscure manufacture. Carlin attaches to each comforter a visible sample of the filling. And our signature QoJLyr^, stitched in a corner of each design, attests our pride of production. These vital factors — superior filling of purity and cuddly warmth, utterly free from needless weight, lovely covering fabric, exquisite designing and refinements of needlecraft — are carefully combined by Carlin to lend enchantment to your bedroom and to protect your restful slumber, too. 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MICHIGAN AVENUE, 528 MADISON AVENUE, AT AT ERIE STREET • CHICAGO 54th STREET • NEW YORK Authorised Agencies I. magnin & company • San Francisco • Holly ivood • Pasadena • Oakland • Seattle lane studios • 41 Church Street, Montclair, N. J. 26 THE CHICAGOAN ON TO GERMANY FOR Good Cheer Prosit! For it's always fair weather in the German inns and cafes. Fine food on the table, and good songs ring ing clear. Jolly hosts wel come the traveler. Students sing in a rousing chorus. Life is real, but life is not earnest, and a good time is its goal! Midnight shows and informal dancing at festive cabarets with hon est prices. A laughter-lov ing people at musical com edies and farces. And too! All the golden beauty of the past. Berlin, Dres den, Munich, Frankfurt. No visa fee, no landing charges. Write for Illustrated Book- £fe let No. 62. GERMAN ™ TOURIST INFORMA TION OFFICE, 665 Fifth Avenue, New York, N. Y "Going to Europe" means going to GERMANY Hackctt has seen La Traviata at least a hundred times. Familiarity bred no contempt. I found that Golden Days, Serenade and Deep in My Heart have lost none of their power to drench the soul with fragrant sentiment; that the Drinkjng Song still stirs nostalgia for days when beer was made by Pabst instead of by Capone; that a polite tear can again fall for the cruel fate of Kathie and her Prince. The cast, including George Hassell and Adolph Link of the original New York production, is worthy. Herr Hassell has been a scream to me ever since I used to watch him in the Old Castle Square Stock Company during my college days. He is a master mug ger, eloquent of tummy, elastic of neck and excruciating of face. His buffoon ery has the subtlety of a playful rhi noceros. Mr. Link is the old German waiter, Toni, as sweetly touching as Traumerei on Mother's Day. You re member Dr. Engel, a part baritones dream about. Hollis Davenny brings full, rich notes and a gracious person ality to the fatherly tutor. They made him render Golden Days several more times than the score calls for. Ger trude Lang offers an appealing Kathie, not so vivacious as some of her prede cessors but appropriately wistful and huggable. There have been flashier Princes than Edward Nells, Jr., but he grows on one by his strong voice and pleasing modesty. As Gilbert and Sullivan have lived beyond the Gay Nineties, The Student Prince seems likely to survive the Twitchy Twenties and the Thirsty Thirties. What You Will IF any faithful seeker after the truth about the drama reads the seven learned newspaper reviews of Jane Cowl's Twelfth Njght, he discovered that it was a gorgeous performance at the Selwyn. My feeble voice raised in an I-think-so-too could add nothing to the critical triumph Miss Cowl so rich ly deserves. So I propose to tilt a bit with wind mills, risk being dubbed an intellectual jackass and sublimate a resentment of the advertising slogan, "The Season's only first class Shakespeare." In other words, to see if Leiber can get a break out of the inevitable comparison be tween the two productions. Mary Hone looked like a boy. Miss Cowl was always the beautiful woman of ripe maturity in masquerade. The younger actress brought as fine a sin cerity and more suggestion of underly ing humor to her portrayal. She did not read the lines for shades of mean ing and with the pure lucidity of her famous rival, but on the other hand she avoided the repeated use of coy man nerisms. I am not contending that Miss Hone's Viola can claim parity with the Viola of a star of outstanding beauty, vibrant personality and polished technique, but there are things to be said on both sides. In one major part I feel the laurels go to Mr. Leibcr's entry, Laurence Ce cil as Sir Toby Belch. To me he was a more authentic personality than the buffooning old drunkard of Walter Kingsford. The latter actor clowned and mugged the role with all the li cense of a George Hassell. Au con- traire, the prim and priggish subtlety of Leon Quartermaine's Malvolio was finer artistry, but no more amusing than the broad boobery of Mr. Leiber's con ception of the famous gull. And down the line the high priced boys and girls from Broadway did not make our Civic Theater Company look so bad. The settings were a matter of taste, con ventional Elizabethan versus the musi cal comedy stunt of using a stage-high book as background with the pages as scenes. If daring to compare the two Twelfth nights gets me expelled from the Critics' Club, put it down to mis directed local pride. gobble! Gobble! THE biggest, juciest turkey which has come to town in years is run' ning wild around the Cort Theater. The label round its neck reads When Father Smiles. Its species is unmis takably domestic. Which leaves one wondering just how bad a play can be and still draw patronage on the strength of cleanly depiction of the American home and what goes on therein. I thought Jonesy was pretty feeble, but it ran and ran. This one makes Jonesy appear the work of a genius. It probably will run and run. DeWolf Hopper is the big noise of the evening. As a choleric pater familias whose family think him insane because he suddenly starts to be agree able, this veteran of six wives and six hundred plays packs more acting into two hours than the whole cast of Street Scene put out in two weeks. Mugging is far too weak a word to give TWE CHICAGOAN 27 any conception of his extravagance of method. The last time I saw Mr. Hop per was his briefer appearance as Luts in one of The Student Prince compa nies. Then his grotesquerie was genu inely funny. But a whole evening of it? Like the author of When Father Smiles, I freely quote Shakespeare: "A little more than a little is by much too much." CINEMA Day by Day By WILLIAM R. WEAVER OLSEN and Johnson are almost as funny in Fifty Million French men as they are at the Palace or else where. They are impeded to some extent by other principals and a kind of plot, not to mention a cinema con ception of the proprieties, and neither is Technicolor an aid to their de liriously unbeautiful style. But Olsen and Johnson can't be everywhere whereas this burbling, babbling roll of celluloid can. The answer, then, is: See Oleson and Johnson if they're in Town, Fifty Million Frenchmen if not. IF I had to write a motion picture at the drop of a hat and before sun rise I should begin with Ruth Chatter- ton and Paul Lukas as fixed points. I'd marry Miss Chatterton to someone else in the first reel, have her meet Mr. Lukas in the second, and then I'd let them talk their way out of it. That's all there is to Unfaithful, or any other Chatterton-Lukas picture, and all there needs to be to any picture to make it well worth my time and, if I may judge by attendance, yours. In the present conversation, that is to say in Unfaithful, these perfectly mated linguists are aided and abetted by a copious cast of seemly and, for the most part, competent companions in arms (yes, most of the time, al though offstage). It is the best of their pictures. OPARE Otis Skinner Kismet. It's *-* a murder. You know the story of course. You know what could have been done with it in the way of stag ing and casting it for the screen. If you treasure it among your happier stage memories, or if you but associate it with the name of a great artist, the film will incite you to crime. The producers were lavish in ex- CONSIDER WHAT HAPPENS BEHIND YOUR FACE! Faces are not the only things being relentlessly exposed by the abbreviated new hats. The back of the neck is coming into full view. As high winter collars and furs give way to spring neck lines this will be only too apparent. Indeed there will be more than one way of risking your precious neck this season! Don't do it. Put yourself at once in the hands of Elizabeth Arden who will see to it that every added inch of exposed throat or neck is added loveliness. Miss Arden can trans form even backs-of-necks (usually so awkward) into some thing quite special and nice. Neck and shoulder exercises, massage, bleaching and softening treatments, will work wonders . . . provided they are accomplished under the expert guidance of Miss Arden's trained assistants. Don't wait for the summer season to surprise and embarrass you. Start now to have the simple care that will prepare you for the most revealing of hats, or frocks. Visit Miss Arden's Salon and be advised by one of her Personal Assis tants as to the special care your own skin and throat should have. For an appointment at the hour you prefer, please telephone Superior 6952. ELIZABETH ARDEN CHICAGO: 70 EAST WALTON PLACE NEW YORK • LONDON • PARIS • BERLIN ROME • MADRID © Elizabeth Arden, 1931 28 TWC CHICAGOAN detofF Wain street On this great 8,500 mile tour Around and Across America, including New York and CALIFORNIA If you're going to travel, then really travel. For one-half your trip get off the great American Main Street that stretches across the continent. Let the family see the fringe of America where everything is fasci natingly new to you — the Panama Canal, America's contribution to the wonders of the world. On the way is a bit of Old Spain, a touch of Monte Carlo— a dash of Paris— all in one gay, throbbing city— Havana. This is the thrilling way from Coast to Coast, the all-water, open-air, Recreation Route on the three new electric liners California Virginia Pennsylvania —largest, finest, fastest steamers in intercoastal service. Fortnightly, 13-day express sailings. Special tours, Around and Across Americaby water and rail. HAVANA TOURS-9-day all ex pense inclusive tours to Havana and return by Panama Pacific Liner. Ask for folder. fa noma facific PlSt-si ALL NEW JUni? STEAMERS INTERNATIONAL MERCANTILE MARINE COMPANY 180 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago or any authorized steamship or railroad agent penditure for settings . . . few modern pictures fare half so well. And Mr. Skinner was lavish in his performance of the principal role, as though intent upon leaving one glorious and indelible imprint of his art. But the supporting cast is without exception the lousiest (no other word) collection of misfits ever brought to focus. I shan't list them (Loretta Young and Ford Ster ling are great guns in stuff they under stand) and I don't really blame them . . . it's the unemployment. But I shall blame myself if you go to sec Kismet. Allah knows I've tried to stop you. SOMEONE ought to tell Al Capone about the censor racket. He might take it over. If he did, establishing a rate commensurate with his liquor per centage, pictures as funny as Lonely Wives could be seen by adult Chica- goans without going to Peru, Indiana. As matters now stand, the receipts lost annually by Chicago cinemas and al lied industries must total a dreadful amount laid end to end. The Asso ciation of Commerce ought to do some thing about it. Lonely Wives was, as you know, a highly successful stage farce. Hordes of adult Chicagoans saw it as produced by A. H. Woods in the stuffy confines of some theatre or other and in the cramped technique of the three- walled stage. None of these Chicagoans is known to have gone to the devil at 11:15, or subsequently. On the con trary, a good time was had by all, and it is even possible to believe that a cer tain percentage of Chicago wives hard ened to husbandly neglect got a break after the lord and master had seen it. A long and meandering preamble to the sad news that Lonely XS/ives (Edward Everett Horton, Patsy Ruth Miller, Laura LaPlante and Esther Ralston are in it, the first-named twice) was a howling comedy before the cen sors deleted all the gag-lines they didn't comprehend. That didn't leave much. MAYBE its age. Whether or no, I'm guilty of a mounting venom for playwrights, producers and di rectors who don't do right by players I like. (This makes me a fan, doesn't it?) Accordingly, having attained an abiding satisfaction in the rare art of William Powell after his Square Deal Davis in The Street of Chance, and having witnessed the bruising and maiming of that art in a couple of ill chosen and ill managed pictures there- • With 65% of our original guests still with us, and a steadily growing clientele, we know we are offering the utmost in hotel home satisfaction. • Beautifully furnished 1 to 6 room suites— ideal location — 12 minutes to the loop — excellent restaurant and food shop in building — exacting service and everything you would wish in your own home. Yes, even very moderate rentals. Why not pay us a visit now? • Ownership Management Direction of FREDERIC C. SKILLMAN Sheridan Road at Surf Street ''Bittersweet 3800 TMC CHICAGOAN 29 after, I instructed the office boy to put a new black ribbon and a sheet of asbestos paper in my typewriter before venturing to see A Man of the World. No less than a quill, then, albeit a scratchy one and a desk ornament at heart, serves me in penning my glad disappointment. A Man of the World is all that The Street of Chance was and one or two things it wasn't. I suppose A Man of the World is really a character study. If that makes Mr. Powell a character actor, no mat ter. He is, in this as in his first master piece, a gentleman who is no gentle man, a barnacle on the good ship society and a fella no good gel c'n trust. He publishes a scandal sheet in Paris (much as a couple o' mugs you needn't worry about if they call you up try to do in Chicago) and that's about enough to tell about the role. What happens to him upon falling in love is not what you'd expect to but probably would ... it may or may not be what you'd want to happen (I'm not sure yet about myself). It is not, as was the case in The Street of Chance, a counterpart of what is supposed to have happened to an unnamed deceased in parallel cir cumstances. It is, I mean, a purely fictional story, therefore a deal closer to fact than fact. I could write about it all day, of course, but neither of us has time for that. Call Randolph 5300, ask the starting time of the picture at whatever theatre it may occupy at the moment, and arrange to arrive at the start. If you don't thank me for telling you I'll thank you to tell me. WELL, I've seen Dracula. Good old Dracula. Good old Bela Lugosi. Good old Universal, good old Carl Laemmle . . . good old hokum. But good! I haven't the slightest idea why any one should fabricate a book of this kind in this era . . . probably no one would. I find it no less difficult to define a motive for making a play of such a book, but someone did. It is even more confounding to learn that sage old Carl Laemmle authorized the infinitely greater expense of producing a picture of the play, and producing it grandly, but sages are like that. And there is yet a more incredible thing— that mod ern Americans young and old, the over- signed among them, sit through Dracula and like it. B USTER KEATON, Charlotte Greenwood, Parlor, Bedroom and Gmrs a raruuin enc, y^he QJtnfyorlance oj the zJlandkniHea QJiceaier Qsuit ... to women who dress with distinction is un rivaled this season . . . One sees them in the new tri-color combinations that are so smart . . . checks . . . perfect looking tweed effects . . . They have the exquisite handmade look and style quality that identifies the genuine . . . Franklin made . . . NEW YORK - 16 East 53rd St. • PHILADELPHIA - 260 South 17th St. CHICAGO-132 East Delaware Place • PALM BEACH 30 TI4E CHICAGOAN IF TRUE 0 Queer lot — New- Yorkers! Once scattered all over these here now United States... then a sudden, wild dream . . . then Noo Yawk. Ten, fifteen, twenty years here now — and do they know the place? Hardly! Some haven't ever walked around the torch on the Statue of Liberty, or tried to swim at Long Beach in July, or set foot inside the Little Church Around the Corner. Why, some haven't even Tea Danced or Dinner Danced or Supper Danced after the theatre to the suave, low-pitched notes of GuyLombardo and his Royal Canadians in the Roosevelt Grill. The ROOSEVELT Madison Ave. at 45th, New York Edward Clinton Fogg — Managing Director Bath — need you ask? You know what it was. It still is. It's funny, in the way a bedroom farce used to be funny be fore they became bawdy, and the per sons here engaged in making it so are persons well versed in just that busi ness. I've an idea it's as good as it ever was, which is a matter of when you were born, where you were reared and so on. We'll not go into that. SELDOM getting enough of Warner Oland, I grouped his Charlie Chang Carries On at the Oriental with his Drums of Jeopardy at the Castle for an evening of crime punctuated by noth ing more virtuous than a DeMet's sand wich. The first is probably the better Oland. He's Chinese in it, he's a de tective in it, and he gets his man. In the second picture he's Russian, he's a criminal, and he gets his men. Death is rampant in both pictures, and of course death is Oland's specialty. If you care for it, see the pictures in re verse order. MARK TWAIN might not recog nize it, and sticklers for form in matters of this kind may not feel quite right about what's been done with the book, but Will Rogers' Connecticut Tan\ee is quite the best film that has been made of it. It is, of course, mod ernized. Additionally, it is equipped with the gags that Will would be using for his daily radio message if some advertiser wealthy as King Arthur could afford it, and Will is funny. I think he's funnier in this, and more Will Rogers, than in Lightnin or So This Is London or So This Is Paris, which makes him funny enough for so many millions of people that I need not urge your attendance nor dwell upon the rough spots and saw edges of a production that thrives upon exactly those things. Go see it. To See or Not to See A Connecticut Yankee: Will Rogers' funniest picture. [See it of course.] Charlie Chang Carries On: Warner Oland as a Chinese detective who gets his man. [If you like Oland.] The Drums of Jeopardy: Warner Oland as a Russian killer who gets his men. [If you still like Oland.] FIFTY MILLION FRENCHMEN: Olscn and Johnson in Paris. [If you like good clean fun.] unfaithful: Ruth Chatterton and Paul Lukas get together again. [By all means.] KISMET: Otis Skinner's best role and efforts ruined by experts. [Sparc him.] It's easy to get to French Lick— but you'll hate to leave! JT's just 8 hours by motor — or an overnight trip on the Monon — to the spa where smart Chicago con gregates these lazy spring days! Come on down — French Lick's a great place to get a month ahead on your golf, to get winter out of your sys tem. Find new vitality in the open and in the sparkling, natural waters of Pluto, Bowles, and Proserpine Springs, in the tonic mineral baths. Play golf on two 18-hole courses, ride, hike, motor in the Cumberland foothills. There's so much to do you'll never get enough of French Lick Springs — climatically correct in its Southern Indiana location. Write or wire for reservations Illustrated booklet on request American Plan Meals Included $8 a clay, without bath $12 and up a day, with bath FRENCH LICK SPRINGS HOTEL COMPANY French Lick. Indiana "Home of Pluto Water" T. D. Taggart. Prcs. H. J. Fawcett, Mgr. Couthoui For Aisle Seats Stands in All Leading Hotels and Clubs TWE CHICAGOAN 31 BOOKS Around the Rinehearth By SUSAN WILBUR NOW and again a nice home-body feels compelled to add to the family income. If she takes to baking pies or stirring chocolate creams dur ing pauses in the family wash she fre quently does add to it. If however she decides to follow Louisa May Alcott's example she almost invariably succeeds only in subtracting. Worse yet, as the stamps and correspondence school fees mount up, her children disintegrate, be ing now the children of a mother who is aiming at a career. In Mv Life Mary Roberts Rinchart urges us to see her simply as a nice home-body, who may have contrived to turn an honest penny when her hus band lost in the 1908 stock market crash, but who never sought a career. Always in fact reached for her pen wiper when the front door slammed to show that a child had come in from school. So much so that at sixteen one boy was given a pipe by Douglas Fairbanks — to stunt his growth. In this way Mrs. Rinehart's truth is kept as moral and uplifting as her fictions. Even so, however, might Napoleon claim that he fought battles and or ganized kingdoms only in the inter vals of looking after his mother, his brothers, and his sister Pauline. Na poleon did look after his family very nicely. Here are just a few of the things that Mrs. Rinehart did in the intervals of being a good wife, mother, daughter, sister, and niece. Wrote books, articles, short stories, and plays in such numbers that it takes a char tered accountant to keep her income tax straight. Was the first war cor respondent to visit the Belgian front. Knew Roosevelt and Harding, and was once mistaken for the wife of Wilson. Wild-wested in Africa, the real west, and Canada. Did philanthropic com mittee work and pondered upon the wrongs and uncertainties of human life. Accepted a Chicago Tribune as* signment and was warned of the dan gers of East Madison street. Tried Hollywood. Learned to juggle the five reference works on precedence so that she could seat a Washington dinner party correctly — provided no two precedentially contiguous guests has previously quarrelled. Shared an Featuring, "The Decorative Vamp" and otker Foster Style Motifs Another of the effective Foste.- Afternoon Slippers with the Decorative Vamp, produced in Black Kid with Dark Grey dec oration and in Blue Kid with a light Blue decoration. Sizes 3 to 9— AAAA to C— #15 The Bag to match, $9.50 In sizes 3 to 91/*} an<^ in widths from AAAA to C this new Foster Afternoon Slipper is produced in the new Black Duckalin (Linen) Black Glacette,Brown,Beige,Dark Blue and Dull Black Kid— piped with contrasting colors — ^^^^ The Bag to match, $9.50 F. E Foster * Company The shoes illustrated are shown at 1 1 5 North Wabash Avenue and Orrin&ton Avenue, Evanston 32 THE CHICAGOAN Shoreland originates a unique party service! . • . . Shoreland now offers an original catering and party service. Now we provide original suggestions — a pro gram from start to finish— the idea of the party — every thing to make your party in dividual, outstand ing, orig inal — unique from very start to successful conclusion. Whatever the occasion — let us show you how Shore- land can give your party brilliant novelty never an ticipated before. HOTEL SHORELAND 55th Street at the Lake Telephone Plaza 1000 New Dance Floor Just Installed Better Than Ever for Dinners • Dances - Weddings Chicago's outstanding private Ballroom— capacity 1000 people. A brilliant room of unique charm and distinctive character. A perfect spring constructed wood dance floor — beautiful red maple — with a cen ter panel of glass illuminated by 2000 multi-colored electric lights. Give your next party here. Extra ordinary cuisine. Attractive prices. Smaller private party rooms, too. Your inquiry or inspection is invited. Telephone Superior 42G4. J. I. McDONELL, Manager Hotel Knickerbocker 163 East Walton Place OPPOSITE THE DRAKE Adjoining Palmulivc Building The Chicagoan 407 So. Dearborn street Chicago, Illinois Please enter a subscription for The Chicagoan as follozvs: ? 1 Year— $3.00 ? 2 Years— $5.00 Name - (Address) - - - apartment with the ghost of Boise Penrose. Mrs. Rinehart says that an uncle re marked of her first published story that it contained enough material for a dozen novels. Let us echo this and say that her first autobiography contains enough material for a dozen autobiog raphies. Jourth Caravan IT looks as though we were almost through laughing at Queen Victoria. As though we were almost ready to admit that maybe four Georges were enough of that sort of thing. Several of the hundreds of ladies who went to the Illinois Woman's Athletic Club to hear "Doc" Evans debate Llewellyn Jones went without their rouge. Is sex or society responsible for the feminine mind. They did not know that the debaters had agreed beforehand to say nothing that could possibly cause a blush. The American Caravan has always been an experiment in futures. But up to now the future has always looked radical. What will the editors do now that the future begins to look like that.'' Well, what American Caravan IV does do is put its most Priestly pieces to the front. A nice long smooth story by Robert Penn Warren, the biographer who thought so badly of John Brown Another long smooth story by Philip Stevenson, whose tone made me suspect a second David Burnham, until I found that he had been through the world war. Further stories by authors who have come into their large follow ing since the last caravan, Jonathan Leonard, William Faulkner, Robert M. Coates, S. Guy Endor, Evelyn Scott. An already emergent white hope of the drama, Virgil Geddes. And so on. Tucked away in the volume, how ever, are signs that the editors hope the radical cause in literature may not yet be quite dead. Here are three old stand-bys from the early days of the revolution: Marsden Hartley, William Carlos Williams, John Gould Fletcher. Here is a Chicago boy, Albert Halpcr, who hacks as if from a block of stone a story that features the "strong" things of life as seen in night postal sorting and modernist art. A book of Freudian love images by Harry Crosby, of the Paris group, who was a recent suicide, and a group of answering poems by Caresse Crosby. A post- Joycian novel by George Whitsett. Furthermore, whistling to keep up their courage, the editors remark that they are nearer their ideal this time than ever before. Jungle Ways and Means THE MAGIC ISLAHP was un doubtedly the most astonishing book of its season. But even without having read that, I feel quite truthful in saying that Jungle Ways is at least twice as astonishing. For one thing it lays down an entirely new principle for anthropologists. Do not, it says, con tinue to regard the savage as inscrut' able. If you are invited to a drinking party in the Ivory Coast jungle, why just take it as a drinking party. Strange things may happen : the chief's nephew may refuse to drink: someone may ex plain that he has been counted off to be poisoned: but at least you have the one fundamental principle to go on. If you are invited to a banquet in the cannibal country, just take it as a feed, - even if the central dish happens to be that which makes a cannibal technically a cannibal. In other words, an anthro pologist should be willing to try any thing once. Even if it's the poison used in a witchcraft ordeal. This poison is supposed only to work on the guilty party. cBull Venning! HERE at last is a really optimistic book about the Chicago situation. Conditions may be bad. There may have been thirty police commissioners in seventy years, and each one may have been tied with political strings all through his brief tenure of office. It may be that no recruit ever flunked his preliminary course. Showing that it is probably not much of a course. That the organization is counter to all prin ciples of efficiency and economy. That the morale is all that Judge McGoorty said it was. Furthermore that there is no earthly way of getting the recom mendations put over that the Citizens' Police Committee makes in Chicago Police Problems, nor any sense in try ing so long as the mayor remains the police commissioner's ranking officer. Nonetheless, say the authors, miracles have been known to happen. For in stance, the rising tide of criminality may engulf the city, and end in catas trophe. And, needless to say, is al ways at its best after catastrophe. zVsCystcr)\ No End LIKE others, Hugh Walpole has now - written a murder story. Unlike THE CHICAGOAN 33 others, however, he begins at the op posite end. In fact there isn't really any this end. For, midway through the book there ceases to be a corpse, and without a corpse there can be no mur der, at least in the Scotland Yard sense. A really clever critic, might find in Above the Dar\ Tumult an un- mentionably profound investigation into the philosophy of evil. Evangelists springing from murder as they do from dalliance or delirium tremens. Or a really cynical one might remark that in spite of the hero being an unemployed war veteran, the layout is as pure Dickens as Priestly, Herbert, or any other of the season's British best sellers. To Read or Not to Read My Story: Mary Roberts Rhinchart has been a successful wife and mother as well as the rest of it. [But there have been times when she got very little sleep.] American Caravan IV: A Yearbook of American Literature whose editors: Al fred Kreymborg, Lewis Mumford, and Paul Rosenfeld: secretly believe that the radical movement isn't dead yet. [If you specialize in literary futures.] Above the Dark Tumult: Murder by a Dickens ensemble in a flat above Picca dilly Circus, with plenty of philosophic implications, but no detectives. [Only if you liked Mr. Walpole's Portrait of a Man with Red Hair.] Jungle Ways: William B. Seabrook's taste for magic drives him to Africa, where he gets tastes also of a number of other things, including cannibal stew, Timbuctoo cocktails, and ethics in the mountains east of Timbuctoo. [Get this quick: or at least don't count on buying it in Boston.] Chicago Police Problems: According to the Citizens' Police Committee, Chicago elected her first police officer in 1837. By the centenary of his election we may be able to put through one or two of the committee's suggested reforms. [Yes, and get your friends to read it.] the science of life: The Wells boys [H. G. and G. P.] and Julian S. Huxley do a popularization of quite a few -ologies. [If you like Wells.] THE SAVACE MESSIAH: The touching Gaudier-Brzeska story done by H. S. Ede. For the select few and possibly a few more. [It may appeal to you.] the marriage of DON QUIXOTE: Adeline Atwater may be an expert on modern art, but not on the art of novel writing. A first novel. [And very firsty at that.] THE gentle LIBERTINE: A girl's experi ences in love from fourteen to twenty- four done in Colette's best manner. [Trv it.] the sophisticates: Mystery story in sheep's clothing and Gertrude Atherton's first book in some time. [Oh, yes.] a tea-shop in limehouse: Thomas Burke's stories with an O. Henry twist, but essaying a few more murders to a dozen. [And here are we, Burken' heart-ed.] When the lost gome is over nothing is so pleasing os sparkling White Rock — thirst quenching, re freshing and satisfying. If you like ginger ale — you will prefer White Rock Ginger Ale, the only ginger ale made with White Rock. 34 TWQ CHICAGOAN MUSIC Remains the Fashion Going places took twice as long . . . and was twice as sweet . . . for blue eyes wor shipped as he gently plucked gay songs from his mandolin that came from ea V MUSIC An Avalanche of Good Pianists By KOBERT POLLAK IN case you have the idea that Ru dolph Ganz is merely the sedate head of a musical college, an occasional toastmaster at musical jamborees, and a conductor of highbrow programs at the Goodman, let me hasten to correct you. He may be all these and more, but first of all, he is a pretty grand pianist, and, if memory serves me right, a much bet ter one all around than he was ten years ago. On March 22 at the Stude- baker he gave ample demonstration of his qualities in an impressive program built upon the Chopin B minor Sonata and twelve preludes (the least familiar set) of Debussy. In picking the most pianistic works of two piano pioneers he set himself a formidable task. Ex cept for a lachrymose moment or two on the first and third movements Chopin never wrote more thrillingly than in this Sonata. It is sturdy and broadly conceived, the music of Chopin the Conqueror, not Chopin the Neu rotic. Ganz tackled it with the req uisite boldness, fully aware of its splendid architecture and maturity of expression. While sensing the noc turnal reticence of the third movement he nevertheless refused to dawdle over it, would not allow it a moment's lapse In his treatment of the Debussy I can only compare him (and he may not like it) with Gieseking and Cortot whom I have always regarded as the finest interpreters of the French master. These preludes, little landmarks in the history of the piano, came from Ganz's hand flooded with shimmering light. A splendid combination of intellect and technique, an understanding of correct pedalling, brought each vignette into lustrous relief. It is a little late to be apostrophizing the intimately personal and elusive quality of Debussy. But how it shines forth when the pianist knows what he is about. The wild paganism of Ondine, the quiet and piti ful pace of Des pas sur la neige, the ironic salute to S. Pickwick, the musical evocation of dead leaves and skyrockets, — all these moods remind us that De bussy, like his Impressionist colleagues, has left his mark forever on the history of music. IT has been a fortnight of pianists. On the fifteenth Horowitz gave an all-Chopin program, marked by his usual electrical intensity and sensitive ness. Like Ganz (and Rachmaninoff too, come to think of it) he relies on judicious dynamics rather than any descent to sentimentality to evoke the poetry of Chopin. Maybe if we looked about more carefully we would see that the ancient Paderewskian style of Chopin is slowly slipping into the dis card. The modern pianist, no less reverential than his illustrious forbears, lexiks first for the architectural line of etude, scherzo and ballade. He begins to suspect that perhaps there is no such thing as "touch" and that if he brings an impeccable technique and a careful regard for dynamics and phrasing to the piano with him, his Chopin will not sound like Padcrewskfs, but it will be just as sonorous and warm. And perhaps it will be more successful be cause his very restraint and discipline will throw into shadow the most an noying characteristics of a great com poser. ON the twenty-third program of the orchestra Jose Iturbi appeared as soloist in concertos of Haydn and Liszt. Despite his largeness of gesture and his soulful glances at the ceiling, Iturbfs pianism is detached, even a little chilly. He played the Haydn with a fleetness and a cold delicacy altogether charming and appropriate. Why he refuses to look at the key board I cannot understand. In the Liszt, where his ensemble playing was only average, he had eyes only for Mr. Stock and, as a result, sprayed wrong notes with careless innocence. Stock ladled out three first Chicago performances. Hindemith's Overture to Irenes vom Tage, a comic opera with one of those silly librettos that only a German could write. The Overture is a neat piece, avoiding any rich counter point and almost Mozartian in its sim plicity. It is scored with the distinction and high-mindedness that currently in forms all of Hindemith's composition. Next to take a bow came Leo Sower- by's Prairie, a symphonic poem based on a verse of Sandburg. That Sower- by has extraordinary gifts, that he will eventually grope his way through half a dozen fashionable idioms to discover his own bent, cannot be denied. Prairie contains episodes of extraordinary TMECWICAGOAN 35 power. It fails principally because its composer has not learned when to stop writing. Time and again this music prepares us for a full stop with some dying cadence, but, like a verbose preacher, fools us and goes on until we are weary of it. The third novelty was Krenek's Little Symphony, an importation of Toscanini. Like most of the Bo hemian's music it is trick stuff, smack ing of insincerity and dedicated to the fad of the moment. Into the con tainer of the old symphonic form Krenek pours more mock-Beethoven and, in the final movement, some jazz that should have been left in its native state. It is, like Johnny Spielt Auf, a little amusing, a little outrageous, and a little dishonest. I WO weeks ago Nathaniel Dett 1 of the Hampton Institute brought his colored choir into town. It sang to a too small audience at Orchestra Hall for his singers are fairly well trained and he sends them through some fine literature, ranging from Bach and Campion to Gretchaninoff. Most of his voices are naturally fresh and pleasant, but the choir shows a dis concerting tendency to wander from pitch. Most interesting item on the program was Dett's own Negro Motet, Dont Be "Weary, Traveler.'' Roxy and his Gang have come and gone, and as far as your correspondent is concerned may they never return. With a heart full of gratitude to the man who has done so much for music in America by his Sunday broadcasts, I went to the Opera, prepared for fur ther edification. The first five minutes I listened to a medley on Dixie. The second ten I practised hollering "Hel lo, Roxy," with four thousand other greeters. The third fifteen I was in troduced to every member of the gang while Roxy delivered himself of broad wise-cracks. But patience, I said. There will be music. There was. A gentleman sang Laugh, Clown, Laugh (with sobs). LJ OROWITZ will play again the * * Third Concerto of Rachmaninoff with the orchestra on April 10 and 11. Florence Austral will be the final soloist a week later. They tell me that Honegger's King David is to be billed as a headliner at this year's Evanston Festival. It's very new! This little Howard 5 foot grand, in the fashion able ebony finish. With a piano in your home, you create a perfect atmosphere . . . especially when the piano is this little Howard, "Baldwin'Built.11 This charming little instrument really enhances the size of your room instead of robbing it of space. THE BALDWIN PIANO COMPANY 323 South Wabash Avenue • The newest of its kind . . smar . . tonally beautiful . . decora tive . . and priced at only $685.°° Spending a fortnight or more away from Town? Notify The Chicagoan, as indicated below, and each fortnight will be topped off with a resume of the impor tant events detailed by staff observers steadfast to the duty of reporting a city that slows not nor slumbers. (Name) (New address) (Old address) (Date of change) ---- '. 36 TI4E CHICAGOAN ST.IPUIS fringe of the theatre, shopping and. business districts, net in a distinctly residential neigh borhood. l|ou will find the Coronado a place for a dau,, a week or a month. Moderate Tariff. Four restaurants. Coffee Qrill. ITlammq Shop. 1SHAM JOllES and his Band. G^HoteL )ronado SAINT LOUIS. MISSOURI FOR RENT Two Bloc\s From Belmont Yacht Harhor DUPLEX APARTMENT— $400. 5 Mas ter Chambers, Wood Burning Fire places, 2 Maids Bedrooms with Bath and Dining Room. 1 ROOM APARTMENT— $275 Wood Burning Fireplace, 2 Baths — Sleeping Porch. Available April 1st Shown By Appointment Only Herbert E. Hyde — Owner 3152 Pine Grove Ave. TF.L. GHACELAND 2303 HARRISON 4010 FOR RENT 222 E. Chestnut Walking distance to Loop 6-7 Room Apartments Each wilh three baths New 19 story Co-op building Chicago's most distinctive apts. Bus at door — Overlooking lake Representative on promises or 'phone Sup. 0898 Cafe Kantonese Excellent Chinese Food Lunch and Supper Reasonable Prices 1007 Rush Street DELIVERY SERVICE, DELAWARE 2185 GO, CHICAGO! Springtime in Seville By JAMES ALBERT WALES ~NQTE: Prime ministers may follow each other in and out of office, the country may have its political troubles but the essential charm of Spain for the traveler remains unchanged. It is a hos pitable country, and a peren nially delightful one. Here, fames Albert Wales who entertained us with his comments on Ber muda a few issues bac\, pictures some of the attractions of the land that should be in your Euro pean itinerary this year. — Editor. I IKE the echoes of a hundred ro- L mantic songs they roll sonorously off the tongue — Cadiz, Barcelona, Se- ville, Malaga, Granada, Guadalupe, Merida! What a land in which to meet the spring! If you are one of those wise travel ers who realize that Europe is most delightful in the early months before the summer hordes descend upon it you will lay plans promptly and he off. And you will enter the continent by a new route, by that fascinating and comfortable southern Atlantic sea-lane which is recommended by the United States Hydrographic Bureau as being the most likely to afford ideal flying weather. It affords ideal steamship crossings as well, this zone of sunny skies and smooth seas, and the ap proach by and through Spain is a beautiful, interesting, and unhackneyed one. But whenever you go, or however you go, Spain must be part of the European tour. Upon landing at Cadiz, you are literally confronted with an embarrassing wealth of routes to travel and sights to see, if you have not already made all your plans. There are so many places in Spain that every one says "must not be missed," that if you tried to see all of them you would have time to go nowhere else in Europe. And close to Spain are color ful North Africa and the Balearic Isles. This group of rarely beautiful islands, within a short distance of Barcelona, Alicante, or Valencia, by boat, basks in summer unending. IN planning your trip anywhere in or away from Spain, you will be amazed and pleased by the care and thoroughness with which the Spanish tourist authorities have ar ranged for your convenience and com' fort. "Tourism" is the foreign word for it, and it is a real science in Spain. The P. N. T. or Patronato Tiaciondl Turxsmo, has a branch in every city and large town in the country. You find fast trains, unsurpassed in comfort and luxury, trains that arrive and depart at convenient hours. You find large and easy-riding auto-buses radiating in almost every direction from every city and important town, reaching the fascinating rural sections quickly and at small cost. You find excellent hotels and pensions, which are required to charge reasonable tariffs in order that the traveler be pleased. You find the finest telephone system in Europe or anywhere else in the world. You find that English is spoken prac tically everywhere. "But," you are likely to interrupt, "this sounds very efficient and busi nesslike and all that sort of thing. Does it mean that even romantic Spain is now standardized and Americanized, and all the romance squeezed out of it?" Quite on the contrary! Transporta tion and hotel services have been mod ernized in Spain, and placed on an efficient basis, but the real charm of the country is still unspoiled. Do not fear lest you find Spain overrun by tourists. It is a large country, and so TUE CHICAGOAN 37 diversified are the appeals of its many sections that not all travelers follow the same routes. One will like to lin ger in Aragon, another in Catalonia, and another in the Basque country. There are no queues or parades of travelers thumbing their Bacdeckers in every public square, museum, or cathedral. YOU cannot standardize or Ameri canize Spain. You will not be there twenty-four hours before you will know why. The reason is that the great mass of the Spanish people do not like change. So, while the in telligent and far-seeing "tourism" authorities have modernized the facili ties for travel, there has been no change in the fascinating life and cus toms of the people. You will sec the methods of bygone centuries still followed in agriculture. Your auto mobile will slow down behind religious processions. It will be delayed by lei surely herds of domestic animals and by long lines of donkeys laden with panniers, and each donkey bearing in addition a Spaniard who prefers rid ing to walking. You will pass wayside shrines where peasants are at their de votions. The aqueduct built by the Romans at Segovia still carries the water-supply of the town. You will learn that manana means not only "tomorrow," but "any old time or never.'1'' Spain is a land of many lands. The people in Andalusia differ greatly from those of Catalonia, and each province has its marked individualities. The country shows the influences of the many invading races that left their im prints upon the national art, culture, language, and architecture. One finds the threads of the Gaul, the Goth, the Roman, the Frank, and the Moor, among others, woven into the warp and woof of the fabric of Spanish life. History, romance, poetry, art, beauty and joy — from the fairylike Alhambra at Granada to the robust roar of the bullfights, the click of dancers in Ma drid cafes and the rich pageantry of the folk festivals — the country has lure for every traveler who crosses the sea. COUPLET Easter Rabbits Have lousy habits. — STOOGE. Three Luxurious Apartments I I I il/ACH apartment is in a de luxe Building with well-trained staff. All are in Chi cago's smartest residential district, close to everything. Now available at prices re vised for the times. 233 East Walton. 11 modern rooms, 4 baths, private laundry attached. Each apartment occupies entire floor. Daylight all around, overlooks lake. 219 Lake Shore Drive. A 6 room, 2 bath apart ment and a 7 room, 3 bath apartment available. Magnificent lake view. Wood burning fireplace. 190 East Chestnut. 10 unusually spacious rooms, 3 baths. Sun room. Jewel safe. Silver vault. Ample storage. Unusually low rental. To insppcl thosv. apartments, telephone us, or our representative at each building will be pleased to show you through. McMenemy & Martin, Inc Real Estate 410 North Michigan Boulevard • Whitehall 6880 rJ M Home of the famous swimming pool ^IHELTOIN at 49™ and Lexington NEW YORK Has all the comforts of a private club. The most enjoyable hotel atmosphere in New York . 38 TUECUICAGOAN | smart shop directory | MiiiiiiiiimiiiiinmiinitiiiiiiiiiniiiiHiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiniiiiiiiiniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimiiHiiiiiiiii^ Ellen Jvench Town and Country Clothes that appeal to the discriminating Miss or Matron Spring Showing Now 5206 Sheridan Road KATHERINE WALKER SMITH Exquisite Lingerie Being Sold at Cost in the Evanston Shop 70 1 Cliurrh Si., Evanston 1660 East 55th STREET AT HYDE PARK BOULEVARD R A N C E S HALE FOI GRACIOUS DICNITY FOR THE MATRON AND THE CHARM OF YOUTH FOR THE YOUNGER SET 1 FURS 108 N. Mate St. 220 Stewart Bldy. C H« of distinction Suite 201 Pittsfield Building HILHOUSE & C? IM&Cap jfllafter* LONDON. Exclusive Agents tarr Best Randolph aitrf Wabo.h •••CHICAGO FINE CLOTHES for MEN and BOYS SHOPS ABOUT TOWN From Chanel to Shoes By THE CHICAGOENNE A DRY voting and wet drinking con gressman isn't any worse than some of the fashion authorities and beauty authorities who have floated into my ken. That's why, having been a thorough admirer of Chanel creations all these years, I was almost fearful when I heard she was in America. But the vision she presented on her brief dash through town was thoroughly re assuring. Slender, attractive, with an appealing little smile, she wore her clothes beautifully. She didn't look like a famous coutouricre. She did look like a perfectly dressed young-ish thing with exquisite taste, but her per sonality outshone her clothes. That was just the thing she emphasized as wc chatted with her during train switches. "Clothes should never be more im portant than the wearer — the smart woman should never look like a man nequin," she warned. So if any of her passing comments don't happen to suit your type don't, for heaven's sake and Chanel's, tear out and follow her dicta slavishly. There is a sweet rcasonable-ness about all her suggestions, which is re flected in the spring clothes and which makes them so much fun to wear this year. Evening dresses, for instance, are shorter. They don't sweep the floor but just touch the ankle. This makes them much more graceful, for dancing especially. Street things are comfortable lengths too. Chanel's sand tweed suit ended about fourteen inches from the floor though if your legs aren't as good as hers you may dip to thirteen or twelve. ANOTHER idea we should be grate- i ful for is Chanel's lenience about waistlines. She does not announce firmly that any one spot is right but places the belt where it will do the indi vidual most good. Her tendency on suits and dresses that have any belts at all is to drop them a little below the normal waist — usually a much more flattering effect than the tightly belted middle. Her short suit coat was belted in this way just above the hips. This suit too had the refreshing white touch of linen at collar and cuffs which is such a fortunate favorite this year. She urges the touch of white on all dark street things to take away the strong mannish look feels that there is nothing like a dash of white to give a well-groomed appearance. Other Chanel -isms that ought to help on the spring wardrobe business are: formal pyjamas arc all right for enter taining in the home but never, never elsewhere; the divided skirt line is never as graceful as the flowing evening skirt line; costume jewelry is the most effec tive type to wear with modern clothes, with evening dress she suggests just a touch of fine jewels or none at all; she is all through with prints for a time; white is the perfect color for evening clothes and for many others; black is always smart and always will be, this year touches of white or solid bright colors make it look newer than all- black; bright colors arc in with a bang and Chanel loves them, especially red: the bright tropical colors prevailing all through the French Colonial Exposition are among the smartest of 193 l's notes; the new contrast idea is ver-ree danger ous for most women and no one can go wrong by clinging to the harmonious ensemble thought; clothes should fol low the natural lines of the figure; she thinks the transparent skirt, slipless effect was just "a little joke of Vion- net's." And so we bade farewell to her sand, white and brown harmony and skipped over to review Field's Fashion Show. THE Field collection embodied doz ens of new ideas and did at least a third of them up brown. Brown has never seemed a very springy color but it is surprisingly refreshing when it is coupled with white as it is in most in stances. A street costume had huge white buttons on brown, the buttons and the white marking it immediately as of this year of grace. Stripes arc very 1931 too. Narrow white ones in brown on an extremely lightweight tweed fabric did it in a novel way. On one panel the stripes were diagonal, on the next horizontal, and so on, giving a finely tucked effect. One of the love liest evening dresses I have ever seen was in delicate green lace, a sort of pale grayish tone even lighter than the cur' rent opaline. This had a tiny narrow TWE CHICAGOAN 39 belt of brown and yellow ribbon and was worn with long brown gloves, the effect — breathlessly beautiful. Blue, of course, is a perennial spring favorite and this year more than ever. The new idea of nothing at the neck and much on the cuffs was introduced in an interesting blue collarless suit with huge cuffs of blue fox on the three-quarter sleeves. The shorter the coat the better is one of the insistent cries of the season too, as indicated in a charming blue ensemble with a bole ro like coat and almost elbow-length sleeves. This was worn with long white gloves and white accessories, blue and white being another combination they've gone mad about. These are smart dashes of other combinations though. A blue dress turned into opal ine green at the top (this light top effect is terrifically chic now) and an other blue suit was worn with a gay Ascot scarf of red and black plaid, with the plaid repeated in the handbag and a tiny red quill tucked into the blue hat. The blue and green dress had two other very smart notes— a wide patent- leather belt and a redingote effect in the skirt to permit the green insert to show. And then we have black and white, chic as ever especially when there's loads and loads of white. Fr-instance a black dress worn with white jacket, the jacket Mousing gracefully above its wide hem fitted tightly at the waist; a black lace evening frock with enchant ing ruffles about the hip and the decol- letage in faintly 1860 manner; and a dashing ensemble of black dress, short vermilion jacket, and white gilet, worn with white accessories. The evening things were quite heav enly. Two treasures you must hunt for were a silk lace in pale coral that was smoothly molded to the knees (gad what figures we need!) and then burst into a cascade of coral tulle. The other was a delicious nude shade of net over taffeta with bands of ruching encircling the skirt at intervals all down the line from hips to hem. The capelike collar was also banded in ruching and a soft blue velvet sash finished the whole thing off with a bang. (They are cov ering shoulders and arms with covers, little sleeves, collars and capes all-a-time in these new evening frocks.) In spite of the vogue for solid colors there are a few prints that are too de lightful to ignore. When prints appear on evening things and pyjamas they are large fruit, leaf or fern designs, espe- AMFRICAS FIRST TRULY CONTINENTAL HOTF.I TIME St. Moritz OX THE PARK 50 Central Park South Neiv York City Old world hospitality in the spirit of the new world; old world service with the newest of the new world's comforts. A cuisine that is the essence of Europe's finest, under the inspired direction of of Paris, London and the Rivieria. Rooms single or en suite, facing Cental Park and but a moment from the city's amusement and business sectors. Personal Direction of S. GREGORY TAYLOR Dear Madam — Let us Put Inner Springs in Your Present Hair MATTRESSES! Old-fashioned, unscientific mat tresses give only partial rest. Inner spring mattresses, having hundreds of springy, cushioned coils, are mo3t scientific and give restful, vitalizing sleep. Make your mattresses mod ern, "alive," always responsive. We do this expert work in a sanitary plant. $29.50 including new ticking. Prompt delivery. Phone, call or write today. Our representative will gladly call. HALE'S Specialists in Products for Comfortable Sleep 516 NORTH MICHIGAN AVE. CHICAGO NEW YORK Superior 7864 WASHINGTON DETROIT You'll Like Chififiewa Water You'll enjoy its refreshing pu rity and soft ness. You'll find it will heif> you drink more water and You'll benefit by so doing. Try a case CHIPPEWA Natural Spring Water "The Purest and Softest Natural Spring Water in the World" PHONE Roosevelt 2920 PROMPT SERVICE EVERYWHERE CHIPPEWA SPRING WATER CO. of Chicago 1318 S. Canal St. 40 THE CHICAGOAN SERVICE WITH A SIMILE Uncle Aubrey's approaching visit. His love of good ale and of revues. The difficulty of finding good ale. The difficulty of finding just ale. The calling of many unlisted numbers. The calling of many friends for numbers. The doubts, the promises and callbacks. The utter lack of frenzy about the tickets. The perusal of The Chicagoan's second page. The selection of shows for dear old uncle. The inking-in of that little coupon below. The arrival of the cases of passing fair ale. The arrival of the theatre ticket orders. And then, the arrival of Uncle Aubrey who, when he has been told all about it, is quite likely to sigh and say, "Ah, good service is like good ale." THE CHICAGOAN, Theater Ticket Service CWICAGOAN 407 So. Dearborn Slree Kindly cuter mv order for theater tickets as follows: (Play) ' "'. (Second Choice) - (Number of seats) (Date) (Second choice of date) (Name) (Address) (Tel. No.) (Enclosed) $ daily good when they are scattered on a grayed blackground. And you'll find a lot of smart women wearing their belts on evening dresses with the bril liant buckle ornaments in back instead of in front. DOWN Milgrim's way they are do ing pretty fetching things with brown, t<x>. You simply must look at the evening dress in silk marquisette of a pinky brown shade. The body of the dress, from bu2£um to knee is just a sheath of exquisitely fine tucking, and the tiny sleeves are similarly tucked. A lovely line is created by soft fluttering ruffles sweeping in a diagonal line from hip to hem in front and back. The sleeves are tied into a flowing bow and the whole is touched up with a tur quoise buckle at the belt. An interesting print of sandy fruits and leaves on a deep red background is used for a charming silk ensemble here. So many details on these things make them almost impossible to describe. De tails like slashed necklines finished with three amusing pins of rhinestone shaped like three dice, a wide sand-colored sash tying the waist of the dress in Algerian fashion, eollarless coat swerving slightly inward at the waist in slightly prin- cesse style and flaring into a wide band of fox at the hem, the three-quarter length sleeves slashed to the elbow to reveal a lining of solid sand color. DARTING swiftly through the hat salon on my way out, I caught glimpses of a few things to draw me back in the near future — knockabout hats in soft, crushy Rodier cloth to take the place of the practically extinct felt; little wool visca caps with flat flowers close against the sides in delectable sugar almond shades; a fresh little blue and white sailor of roughish straw with white ribbon band and an intriguing white bow, one on the upper brim, one beneath in an inquisitive little lift above the right eye. The last, inci dentally, was part of the new collection of hats for meagre allowances — how meagre you'll be thrilled to discover. From hats to shoes was just a jump down the boulevard to I. Miller. Here I found much being made of oxfords cut low to give a graceful line to the foot, brown with inserts of python and black with inserts of Java lizard. Pat ent leather is rearing its shiny head again, and Miller sponsors plain opera pumps in this with accessory flat bows of leather in black and white, blue and white or brown and white. When you go Shopping... AS YOU ride in Yellow Cabs, in individual comfort, you will L see many valuable buying suggestions from Chicago's finest merchants on the new Adometer. Adometer offers intense interest. The novel miniature posters are animated and illuminated. They are displayed before you in sequence in an easily moving, entertaining panorama. You will be entertained as you ride by reading the message of these exclusive advertisers. They are an infallible guide to your selection of the best it is possible to buy from those who cater to Chicago's most distinguished clientele. ADOMETER CORPORATION of America 1775 Broadway 520 North Michigan Avenue NEW YORK CHICAGO Sunshine ellows Heat Purifies The advice of your physician is: Keep out of doors, in the open air, breathe deeply; take plenty of exercise in the mellow sun shine, and have a periodic check-up on the health of your body. LUCKIES are always kind to your throat Everyone knows that sunshine mellows -that's why the "TOASTING" process includes the use of the Ultra Violet Rays. LUCKY STRIKE -made of the finest tobaccos —the Cream of the Crop- THEN -/#ITS TOASTED"- an extra, secret heating process. Harsh irritants present in all raw tobaccos are expelled by "TOASTING." These irritants are sold to others. They are not present in your LUCKY STRIKE. No wonder LUCKIES are always kind to your throat. *« 1931, The A. T. Co., Mfrs. It's toasted Your Throat Protection — against irritation — against cough. l/NE IN — The Lucky Strike Dance Orches tra, every Tues day, Thursday and Saturday evening over N.B.C. networks